My good friend M has been studying in an engineering major in Tsinghua University from undergraduate to postgraduate. In recent years, he has often joked to me about the “talent race between finance and research”, in his own words: “Just as in Japan 20 years ago, the smartest people are now going into finance instead of industry.”
With the market at its command, the financial industry is understandably able to offer better pay, and M understands their personal choices, but M regrets and worries about the status quo.
The following story comes from M.
1
When I first met Zhou Xingyuan, I didn’t think he was anything special.
At that time, I had just entered Tsinghua University and was successfully admitted into my favorite engineering major, so my heart was naturally full of passion. On the day of registration, my mother and I passed through the gate of the second school, watching the tour group with a bunch of children taking pictures there, I felt a sense of ownership suddenly. The sun hit my face, and the glory of this beautiful and profound sacred temple shone on my face.
The guy across the bed from me was dark and thin. He was hunched over making the bed. He looked like a malnourished monkey.
I was lugging an oversized suitcase, but the guy had only an old black rucksack and was leaning feebly against the table. My mother asked him, “Son, where is your family?”
“Pa came with me,” he said quietly. “He put me down and left to catch tonight’s train.”
My mother saw the signs, holding two KFC buckets, beckoning the guy to get out of bed and eat something before cleaning up. He declined the invitation, felt embarrassed, slipped out of bed, reached out his black hand and seized a chicken piece.
My mother asked him what his name was, and he said his name was Zhou Hangyuan.
My mother smiled and stared at him: “the child ah, your name is good, a sound is the home of culture, after you two live together, we study hard, help each other.” He looked up at my mother with a twinkle in his eye.
Later, after getting acquainted with each other, I knew that Zhou Xingyuan’s family was in the mountainous area. Both of his parents were teachers in villages and towns. Although they were both officially employed, teachers in the mountain villages were badly paid and sometimes they could not get their salaries. By the time the admission letter from Tsinghua arrived, the whole county of his hometown was singing its praises, and his high school headteacher had contacted a company in the city to sponsor his four-year tuition.
Facing Zhou Xingyuan at that time, I still felt a little superior. I was born in a big city. Although my family is not rich or expensive, it is still a family with a small family and I am quite comfortable in my daily life. More importantly, I studied in a key high school with the best teaching level in the province, and won a provincial prize in the subject competition. By contrast, Zhou Xingyuan was an excellent student in his small county, but when he arrived at Tsinghua university, the disadvantage of his weak foundation was immediately apparent.
The first semester in the middle of the linear algebra exam, because it is on the computer, you can see the results on the spot. After the exam, I lounged back to the dormitory humming a little song. After a while, Zhou Xingyuan also came back, he climbed to bed, sitting dazed, for a long time just pathetic babbbily asked me: “How much did you take the exam?” It sounded like someone in the water begging someone nearby to give him a hand.
“95.” I thought to myself, this problem is simple, we are not more than 90 points.
Zhou Hung his head, his chin in his hands, and said nothing.
Then he rustled his satchel out the door and didn’t come back until the lights were out. I sent him a text message to ask where he was, he simply replied: “On self-study, you go to bed first.”
When I was sleeping in a daze, I saw a dark shadow creeping up to the opposite bed. It was zhou Xing who had come back from a long trip, but he didn’t wash, so he went to sleep. When I looked at the alarm clock, it was three o ‘clock. At six o ‘clock the next morning, he got out of bed on the dot, picked up his schoolbag and went out again.
Zhou Only sleeps for 3 hours every day for half a semester. I think he is just a little bit crazy and dare not talk to him. One weekend morning, When I woke up, I was surprised to find that he did not go to study, but sat at the desk dully. After looking at the mirror for a while, he suddenly turned to us and said calmly and seriously, “I see the light of truth in my eyes.”
We a dormitory of the people laugh to death, from now on on joke called him “real person”.
2
Real person’s study result advances by leaps and CHS, to the final linear algebra exam 93, at this time I dare to ask him: “your midterm after all took an examination of how many?”
He shook his head in embarrassment. “Fifty-seven.”
“You can, boy.” Although I still think he is a little silly, my heart is more a bit of a new look.
Reality like a born envy the fish of the sea, finally found doorways, entering the professional study of wang Yang, oblivious to the things that to learn: the clothes wear dirty throw to the foot of the bed and wait for the clothes wear dirty, he also can’t remember which one foot of the bed clothes washed which didn’t wash, casually picked up a piece is then, what is more, he often do not wash feet for a few days, a take off their shoes, and a stench coming from the bedroom.
One day, I couldn’t help yelling at him: “Your uncle’s, smelly dead, can you take a bath?”
He stands up with a loud “Oh, sorry, I didn’t notice, I’ll go right away!” He took off his socks and put on his slippers and swished out with the basin in his arms.
I glanced at the socks he had thrown down, and though I was not very clean, they were so gross: the toes and heels were so swarthy that they probably hadn’t been changed for at least half a month. Now although the others had gone, the socks still gave off the smell of salt fish. I was angry and picked up the broom and swept them into the rubbish heap.
The real man came back from the shower with a little foam on his ears, and peered around twice: “Hey, where are my socks?”
When I said I had swept them out, his face became sad. “I only have that pair of socks!”
The two roommates laughed, and the real person angrily grabbed some change from my bag and walked out. I suddenly realized That I had gone too far. “Where are you going?”
He is angry again can not help laughing: “you big ye of, go to bauhinia supermarket to buy socks!”
In fact, there is no living difficulties at that time a reality – the hometown of the boss sponsored the tuition, and work-study programs, scholarship for his life – but he is very frugal, often send money home, each of us has a function room, between the two dormitory inside can make a long distance IP phone, we often go to home for the next half hour, buddy and his girlfriend to talk on the phone, about one or two hours the hate and continuing have no unique period, and the reality, every three to five minutes to hang on.
Sophomore year, “Xiaonei” just started popular, we feel very fresh, we went to register accounts. All kinds of talents and poets recited poems and wrote fu on it, inspiring words, And I would also go to record some of the running accounts of life. Another important function of Xiaonei is to flirt with younger women, with handsome roommates proudly revealing how many “beautiful women” they are.
Real people went to the zhongguancun Hailong building has not closed a batch of parts, DIY their own desktop. However, his “school journal” is articles such as “The Impact of International Oil Price Fluctuations on XX Engineering Industry”, “Shale gas and New Energy Development” and “My View on the Latest Academic Developments of XX Engineering”.
Just looking at these topics, I thought he was getting it from some professional media. Can open a look, can’t help but secretly surprised: the real people to the international frontier of the profession of the latest trends to maintain close attention, constantly thinking about how to break through in this field, technological innovation and the actual situation of the country combined. Most of all, this attention and thought was a genuine passion for him, and the passion and excitement in the words suggested that he took complete pleasure in it, and that he was absorbed in it like a child obsessed with a game.
I had thought that real people were learning only by the brute force of a sort of hanging SPAR, but reading these articles showed that this fish was far ahead of us, in some faint, charming place deep in the sea.
3
Once, I and the real person eat chicken leg rice in the dining hall, chat to a department just graduated doctor senior. That elder brother from undergraduate course to doctor read 9 years in this major, graduate however one foot stepped the door of the bank. I felt sorry and a little uncomfortable.
In the beginning, it was very hard to work in our profession. People would go to places where there were projects, and the projects were often in old and rural areas with little money. If a project was not worked out for several years, they would have to tighten their belts. Therefore, some people change careers after they get their master’s degree or doctor’s degree. With the golden sign of Tsinghua, many people go to the financial industry. It is easier to earn quick money, and some take the civil service exam.
Chatting, the real person suddenly asked me: “why do you choose this major when the college entrance examination newspaper volunteer?”
“My mother said I was ugly, and that it was more practical to learn some practical skills.”
Real person is like mouse “hey hey” ground smile: “quick, say well, serious point.”
I glower: “this is not thinking of ‘industrial salvation’!”
The words came out, I felt a little guilty and felt too melodramatic, but the words poured out of the water, since they can not get back, had to bite the tongue and say: “when I was a child, there were many factories closed in the northeast, my father had friends in shenyang, my hometown and some people in Harbin, jumped off a building have. At that time the teacher said to us: ‘To study hard ah, later if you can put some industrial technology innovation, to save the factory, that would be good’ – damn, it seems that the PE teacher.
The real person take me to speak carelessly, rob me a piece of chicken leg meat: “I know you be like me, I also be. Do you know what the company in my hometown sponsors my tuition does? — The noodle man! Our county benefit the best enterprise, a little technical content of the factory, no one!”
He said, after the university entrance exam, he climbed the highest hills close to home, from dusk to sit to the stars, look at near the village and township roads to jump on a shot of motorcycle, dusty silent trees, suddenly feel that “everything is ready for me,” like all the other hill, the houses on the earth and rivers towards his feet together. The next day, he filled in tsinghua Engineering major, the second choice of the school, did not fill in at all, all empty. “After coming to school, I felt more that I made the right choice. You see, our laboratory has to import all important precision experimental equipment from abroad.”
Reality began to talk about his forecast to our prospects for professional development, both of us more say more speculative, the light of the human eye is more and more light, I suddenly understand why in a moment to take a bath, change socks, call these things for him like the dust gently fall in the body, there’s little sense – he has already got completely stuck into science and the perfection of the big beauty, the beauty of intense pleasure occupied his mind and body, mobilized all his senses to him.
By the second semester of the sophomore year, his overall score ranked the second in the whole grade. Although I had been working hard, I was only above the top ten in the exam.
In the three years of high school, My academic performance never fell out of the top three in the grade. Despite the ups and downs, I sat on a fishing boat steadily. I enjoyed the admiration of my classmates and took it for granted that I had a talent beyond ordinary people. But in my first year at Tsinghua, I began to feel painfully that I was really just a person with ordinary INTELLIGENCE in this place where tigers and tigers lurk. Edison said, “Success is ninety-nine percent perspiration and one percent inspiration.” But then there’s the other half: “The one percent of inspiration is the most important thing, even more important than the ninety-nine percent of perspiration.” Without such inspiration, a person may become a good scientific researcher and obtain many honors in his whole life, but he can never open a new sky for the sight of human beings.
And very few of heaven’s beloved, they can vaguely feel the twilight of the sky when they are young, this light entices them to look up to the high, drill the very strong. I gradually believe that the real person is one of the lucky ones.
4
After graduating from the university, I continued to study for my master’s and doctor’s degree, while I applied to study for my doctoral degree in the United States under the guidance of a well-known scholar in the industry.
In bo 4, our professional industry conference was held in San Francisco, USA. This is an industry event, and researchers in related fields around the world will not miss this opportunity to communicate with top counterparts. I was also honored to apply for a place to attend the conference, where I met real people who have been absent for three years.
Real people have become more mature and act with more confidence. He had changed into a pair of black-rimmed glasses and wore a white shirt. He walked far away and had a touch of American elite. We gave each other a big hug, and the familiar feeling came back at once — the real person under the clothes, the same!
The meeting set up a buffet meeting, let everyone take a little food, free exchange. What seems like a casual chat is actually a great opportunity to share insights and network, with real people occasionally greeting attendees with names that carry weight and have a place in American academic circles. In my experience of attending conferences, these “bulls” are innately arrogant, especially towards non-European faces. Once they think you are not academically competent and are studying what’s left over from Europe and the US, they will quickly end the conversation in a polite and courteous manner.
But when they see a real person, they invariably show a warm warmth.
The deepest impression is a professor from Taiwan – the man I had heard, in his early years achieved tenure in American colleges and universities, is the Chinese academic circles “and” — he came over and keep the reality of the shoulder, and repeatedly praise: in pure American English “you sent last month’s article I saw, very creative, your talent makes me admire!” The real person is still with a trace of hometown accent English response, very easy.
After the meeting that day, it was still early and we went to Fisherman’s Wharf together. He had been in the United States for four years and had not been there. The docks are lined with pubs and souvenir shops, and street artists play saxophone and organ or perform guitar. We walked from the commercial center to the pier, the sun shining like gold foil on the sea, turning deep blue and black on the one hand and shining brightly on the other.
We talked about each other’s research topics, and the real person was still very concerned about the way to convert old and new energy, and predicted the development direction of the industry five years from now. At a time when everyone in the domestic field was thinking about what to do next, I was sceptical of his predictions. The real person said, “Let’s make a bet and see if this is the case in five years. If I win, you can treat me to sichuan hot pot, the hottest kind with green prickly ash and sesame oil dish.”
“Fine, but I wonder where you will be in five years.” I said.
He looked at the sea. “I should have gone home.”
He told me that he had just fallen in love with a Chinese student who had come to his school to study for a master’s degree. That girl was very simple and lovely. Her parents did not want her to stay abroad and hoped that she would come back to China after graduation. “Also, after all these years of studying, I still want to go back and do something — sometimes I wish I could graduate earlier and go back sooner.”
I reminded him that although the national support for scientific research has been increasing in recent years, I have seen many drawbacks in the scientific research industry in China. With his current ability, it is not difficult for him to find a job in the United States after graduation. After returning to China, there may be various obstacles, and it will not be as smooth as he imagined.
He nodded. “I know, I know… But it’s still very exciting to think that when I go back, I might be able to make some changes and push.”
As he was leaving, he suddenly asked with concern, “How is your mother? How are you?”
I smile: “not bad, energetic, do you still remember, in those days I called her in the hall, pressed the speakerphone, she scold me is a dead pig, you heard, joke for a week. And she still does.”
He laughed and said earnestly, “Auntie is really a very nice person. I always remember the first day of school when she invited me to KFC –” He paused. “It was the first time I had KFC in my life.”
5
After my doctoral degree, I went to a scientific research institution, which is half research and half application. This institution attaches great importance to the transformation of theoretical innovation research into industrial results, which is in line with my development expectations. The only thing that made me feel uneasy, even guilty, was that my mother used half of her life savings as a down payment on a house I bought in Beijing the year I graduated.
It has been nine years since I was admitted to Tsinghua University and graduated with my PhD. I had made no material contribution to the family in the long years except for some personal glory to my mother, and now I felt guilty about having to empty her pension fund to buy a house. I also considered either has two years to make a quick buck, their saving a down payment, but I know that scientific research need long-term, continuous investment in this line, even before the performance of again good, if break two or three years, also is equivalent to dig their own graves – rapidly changing industry, once to leave, his feeling for scientific research quickly passivation, want to come back again, it is difficult to move on.
When it came to the dilemma of whether to make quick money, my mother glanced at me and said, “When you grow up like this, you should be honest and do scientific research.” “I never believed in easy money,” she said with a philosopher’s smile, as I glowered at my beard. “Easy money comes and goes, and solid money is good.”
After one year’s work, I suddenly received an email from a real person. He said that he had returned to China last month and was about to join the research institute of Beijing headquarters of a large state-owned enterprise. He was not sure when he returned to China, so he didn’t tell me until all the dust had settled.
In the mail, he writes, “the wife’s parents pay the down payment for us in Beijing, while the wife is very understand, always encourage me, now that you have a family, to share each other, but in my heart that time waits for no anxiety has become more urgent, after saved up for years, waiting for many years, I can’t wait to make achievements, transforming life difficult…”
Seeing this, I have mixed feelings. As a fellow student, I can certainly understand the anxiety and gap in the heart of real people during the long process of doctoral study. One of our undergraduate roommates changed his direction in a relatively easy way when he was studying for his master’s degree. After graduation, he joined a “unicorn” company which has nothing to do with his major, and now he has an annual salary of 500,000 or 600,000 yuan. I accept mom’s down payment is still so uneasy, real people and how to face sensible wife, native family expectations and the burden of the heart?
At the same time, see the reality of work, I’m a bit concern – I read bo during a relationship going good senior is the institute, he said, the treatment was quite good, but with a lot of unhealthy practices monopoly state-owned enterprises: internal factionalism, seniority, the old man always forced the couple, ability outstanding, but there are also mixed eat etc. I guess the real person in the foreign countries for so many years, about these circumstances are not very understanding, do not know whether acclimation?
In addition, this research is “leader leadership”, which is in a group, all members of the research direction, content is determined by the team leader, if leader think group research direction is wrong, or do not tally with the actual demand within the group, so will not give him with the corresponding experimental resources, the resources including time, funds, personnel and other aspects. If the newcomer is assigned to a good group, with sufficient funds and a leader with vision and mind, then the life will be better. On the contrary, if you go to a bad group, the group leader is narrow-minded, do not allow the new challenge authority, then the new ability again strong, is also a clever housewife without straw.
Faced with this sparkling and excited email from a real person, I couldn’t bear to smash his vision with a blow. Maybe everything is just I think too much, maybe that hearsay is not to believe, maybe real people luck will be very good to meet a good leader… I replied and wished him all the best.
6
When the real person started his job, he was assigned to a relatively marginal position because he had almost no contacts in China despite his impressive resume. He didn’t care. He thought the gold would always shine.
But soon he smelled a sense of unease. Lao Li, the group leader, was a good man. He never criticized anyone in person, nor did he ever say a harsh word to anyone. There are several older and qualified colleagues in the group, when going to work wobbly, a point to get off work will be in high spirits, anxious to advance 10 minutes on the equipment, instruments, computers are all turned off, only to wait until the clock left; He combed through several important engineering projects in the group. When he had some questions, he went to consult the old people and found that they all spoke in a grand way. When they got to the key technology, they could not speak clearly.
At the first meeting of the whole group, the real person reported his scientific research plan for the next three years. Lao Li smiled awkwardly and did not hesitate. After the meeting, Lao Li came to see him and said gently, “Xiao Zhou, you may not be familiar with the situation as you just came here. Our scientific research content is mainly based on the actual needs of the company. As for some long-term and forward-looking projects, we will discuss them when appropriate.”
Real people know that they may be jumping the gun. Engineering experiment is indeed very expensive, it is very common to buy an instrument of hundreds of thousands of yuan, he put his energy and time into it, and it is difficult for him to undertake more tasks in the group. It is quite normal for Lao Li to distrust himself when he first arrived.
Seeing him silent, Lao Li patted his shoulder and said, “Young man, I have been there before. Be calm.”
The real person became the one who came off work the last day in their group. Lao Li also saw it and gave him the key project in a group. The real person spent more than a year to make the key technology of the project come out. This technology has long been mature in foreign countries, but it is a breakthrough in China. From top to bottom, the institute publicized this scientific research achievement vigorously. The biggest credit is, of course, the leading leader, followed by the middle level, and finally the group leader, Lao Li.
The real person knew it was the rule and said nothing. However, at the end of the year, there was still no name for him. He had some resentment in his heart, Lao Li also felt vaguely wrong, and took the initiative to find him: “The two comrades evaluated this year, as you know, have stayed in the group for a long time, we need to mobilize their enthusiasm through this way. This kind of evaluation is a rotation, understand, the future opportunities are many.”
“It’s not fair.” And then he told me that what came to his mind at the time was that that’s quite unfair. They quite often said that and over time they got used to it.
However, this sentence immediately made Lao Li very embarrassed, he sighed: “Young man, too exposed edge is not a good thing, everything is your advantage, the water is full of ah.
The grumbling of real people was now turned to anger: it would have been a good thing, a lifetime of backwardness, to have one’s hands tied behind one’s back by such a sophisticated philosophy, if one did not have a great rush for heights in scientific research.
But he refrained and said nothing.
Perhaps it is guilty, after a few days, Lao Li agreed to do their own experiments.
Real people start from scratch, first have to buy equipment. The instrument he wanted to buy was made in The United States. Due to the large amount, he did not have the right to purchase the instrument himself, so he had to fill in the application by himself, and then the hospital would purchase the instrument uniformly after examination and approval.
Half a month after the application went up and still nothing happened, he couldn’t help but call the financial department to inquire about the progress. There, with a hearty smile, he said, “Young man, don’t worry, we are still going through the procedure.”
Half a year later, the instrument was finally bought back. The quality made in Japan was not on the same level as that made in The United States, and there would be unstable conditions, resulting in inaccurate experimental data.
“But it’s better than nothing.” “Thought the man to himself.
The final straw was a year later when Lao Li told him to stop: “There was some gossip in the group that you were spending the most money and doing something that had nothing to do with the task in the group, so stop.”
“In fact, Lao Li is a good man and has been bearing some pressure for me. I know he has a lot of difficulties as a team leader. The most difficult part is not doing skills, but balancing complex interpersonal relationships in various aspects. But at that moment I hated him very much. I poured out my hatred of the entire institute on him alone. I hate his weakness.” The real person told me later.
7
After the celebration this year, I invited a real person to dinner: “This is not, still owe you a sichuan hot pot.”
See real person a leng, I hammer his a fist: “you boy 5 years ago of prophecy come true, I now bitter ha ha stem is you say of that direction!”
He smiled, “Just find a place nearby to eat. I have to go back to work.”
He wore a suit jacket that day, but it was always a little strange, as if the formal suit had bound him tight. The room is a little hot, he took off his coat, shirt rumpled on the back, he said: “In the securities company to work, every day have to dress like a dog, lest others do not know he is the elite.
Real people in the research institute at the time of the most frustrated, his wife was pregnant, he was like in a frying pan in two sides of steamed bread piece: he did not contribute to buy a house, always have to put the monthly mortgage repayment and the child’s milk powder money out? As my parents grow old and suffer from minor diseases, I have to go home for blood transfusion from time to time. The money I need will only increase… So he finally decided to quit and go to a securities firm.
The securities company offered him a double annual salary. Now his main job is industry research. With his keen sense of smell to the technical major, he recommended clients to buy high-quality stocks in the industry.
“I’m a broker now.” He said.
Hearing the disappointment in the real words, I had to cut up a joke: “That is better than me, every day to the project site, dirty face, the factory is short of manpower, but also to help carry the gas bottle.
“It would be better if you did.”
“You have a lot more talent than I do.” I sigh a little.
The real man said that now he truly realized that if he wanted to do scientific research, talent alone was not enough. He had to have three generations of capital accumulation in his family. Otherwise, sooner or later, in the long process of searching, the material anxiety that followed him would come to the surface and drown all talent. In fact, when he was an undergraduate in the United States, or even earlier, he had been thinking about making money, but at that time the scientific research was so smooth that he mistakenly thought he could stick to it regardless of everything.
“However, if there were no distractions in my mind, I should have gone to college when I came back to China. I went to graduate school because I wanted to do more for my family and get a better salary.”
I suddenly thought: compared with the older generation of scientific researchers who could go straight to the desert to build an atomic bomb, our generation has a much better life, but why are we still under the pressure of an invisible hand, so that we are in constant fear?
“Sometimes I say to myself, this is a necessity; Sometimes I despise myself, not to insist on the love, are not real love, although nine dead it has not regretted, that is the real love.
The real person moved the heart, unexpectedly talk a lot. Toward the end of the meal, he suddenly said to me, “You know, I sent out seven SCI papers during my PhD.” (Note: SCI is the abbreviation of Science Citation Index. It is a citation database established and published by the Institute of Scientific Information in 1961. It is generally believed that SCI journals are internationally recognized authoritative journals.
For the first time in years, I saw a light in his eyes as he kept a low profile while winning scholarships every year.
I am surprised “oh” 1 — want to know, general university science and engineering hair one can doctor graduation, I doctor period utter chi to utter chi ground also hair 2, real person hair 7 (not all are first author), can be my generation model.
But the light in his eyes darkened at once, and he gave a bitter smile. Come on, buddy.”
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