The word “filial piety” is terrible

Editor’s note

These are three stories about parents and families. No matter increasingly attributed to the dull daily, or the original quiet life suddenly waves. Love or quarrel, happiness or misfortune, here seems to have someone’s shadow, but also seems to be different. This is the second issue of sharing Everyone’s Story with Everyone. Thank you for sharing with us. Share everyone’s story with everyone vol.2
My daughter-in-law is the giant baby mentioned in the article, mama bao, a woman in her thirties. Whenever there is something trivial, she calls her mother. Her mother does the same thing.

As long as there is a little conflict with me, I immediately hide and let my parents come forward, so that the two of us can talk about the small problem to solve, become two adults involved, how can not clear up a mess.

Many times I told her confidentially that people cannot depend on their parents for a lifetime, and they will need our care in the future. From now on, they need to cultivate their independent living ability and spiritual consciousness. We can solve the problems of our own family by ourselves, but we just don’t listen.

The mind of a thirtysomething is the same as that of a thirteen-year-old.

I found this problem before marriage, but at that time thinking of her simplicity, and her mother-in-law is a very hard-working person, thinking that I will slowly remind her later, she will gradually mature and independent. But now I am completely disappointed. When I have a child and my parents are old, I will have to take care of four old people and children and take care of the 40-year-old baby every day. It frightens me.

She 162 height, fast 140 weight, than I this 175 male also heavy, these two days said two words for the health of the future, more exercise exercise, not too lazy words, and hide behind their parents, let the parents come forward to talk to me, I hope I give her an apology, write a guarantee.

But this time, I do not wait, decided to divorce. Even if I can endure, for the sake of the future children, I will leave this willful selfish, lazy aunt bao.

— @key6141428 [netease tsinghua university user]

My parents are like this, which may be the reason why I have been obedient since Childhood.

However, since I went to college and went to work, I became very independent and no longer obeyed everything. Although they were far away from home, they still tried every means to enter my life, and the final result was that they were forced to get divorced under various moral abductions.

“Filial piety” is a terrible word. I’ve had enough of them for two years, whiling away every day in the hope that I could find another one, but I feel that they are in poor health due to their age and not being around to take care of them. I don’t want to hurt their feelings.

I suffer from this all the time, every time I try to talk to them, they always say, change, change. But their last words will always be “We are doing this for your good, Mom and Dad are getting old, you are our only hope.”

I’m really in pain.

— @yanhekbyf [netease shijingshan district, Beijing]

My mother is a little like this, all the way to the university to choose a major, even graduation job, and even arranged a blind date during the sophomore year, the object is her friend’s son.

After graduation, I never went home, found a sales business job to support themselves, at the beginning is always bitter, rent is to borrow classmates, eat rice is to send pickled vegetables, a eat is two or three months, even if death did not call home.

Later, know now husband, he divorced with a girl, my mother is to say break off the relationship.

Then, now I desperately happy.

  • @ 601 ad845106945f3d5af4aafb7d7dd94 [netease China mobile Internet users]

Little Lu’s experience, I really feel it. Now that I’m in college, I can sort of organize my life, but there are always some values fighting in my head, and what my parents have instilled contradicts what I’m aware of.

I also went to the hospital to see the psychiatric department, but there was no money for treatment, and I could not let my family know. It was because I was confined at home for two months during the winter vacation that I relapsed.

Now Doing NGO work in Shanghai and journalism at the same time, these brave choices bring me some comfort.

  • CKM

A few days ago, I received a phone call from dad. After a few words, He said, “Hang up. Too much talk is not sweet.”

When I was a child, my mother wanted me to be a master of life and said to me, “It’s all for your own good.”

When I grow up, I hope I can manage my life well. She said, “Mother depends on her son.”

She was a cruel woman, always whipping me in ways That I couldn’t refuse. I dropped out of school at the age of seventeen, and she was crying in the dark. When I was eighteen and just coming of age, she said she gave you two options: “be a soldier or go to school.” I said I went to school and she smiled down her wrinkled face.

Thank God I met you two such a quarrel, but give me infinite warmth of the enlightened parents.

Thank you for your hard work at the bottom of the ladder.

I am 23 years old this year, I know how to Thanksgiving, crow regurgitation, lamb kneeling milk, will be put!

— @single dad.

Share everyone’s story with everyone vol.2
Seeing what you said made me cry again.

With the author’s parents are also very like my parents, my father’s hard all his life, didn’t earn a lot of money, go home will also be some small CARDS, mother is a typical wife, two people from time to time to some pettishness, but my dad never quarrel with my mom, were less likely to my mom, they are the most good at the cold war, this also is I most afraid of, often a month don’t talk, something let me do the mouthpiece.

Finally, our brother and sister married and established a career, the day was a great disaster on the sixth day of this year, dad came back from playing cards and quarreled with people on the way was pushed to the ground, causing severe brain injury, the same night we had an operation.

Her husband at 5:30 in the morning call and let me go to the hospital quickly, the phone heard my mother crying, I dragged the fracture haven’t good body outside a tough rushed to intensive care unit, separate far away she heard mother cry and shout, “the old man, you must be quite the past, our two fights for a lifetime is not yet a tie, is not yet enough to fight, do you want to come back with me then dou……”

Then transferred to the hospital, my father had another operation, but finally failed to save my father’s life, nearly a month, I still can’t accept this reality, always feel that my father is still in the world did not go, he just went out to play cards.

— @netease mobile phone user in jiangsu province

See half can not help but shed tears, so similar to life.

My father prided himself on having raised the family’s economy and built a new house, and then continued to complain about the hardships of life, social injustice and physical discomfort.

While silently taking care of everyone in the family, my mother always complains that my father thinks too much of his hard work and neglects others’ contributions to the family. My brother and I were away, and my father would call us and tell us what was going on, who was making more money than us, what was hurting, and my mother would ask us if we were busy lately, if there was anyone right around us, and ignore my father’s complaints. He brought it on himself.

Father’s health is not good, but he doesn’t want to go to the hospital, but he still smokes and drinks. The mother is also, although the white hair of sideburns is few, the body is nothing serious disease, but always mouth ulcer.

How can we keep pace with the changing social environment while keeping pace with the complaining past of our parents? Will they live apart forty years from now?

— Blue blood butterfly

My mother-in-law and my father are similar to this father, my father-in-law and my mother are like this mother, and my husband and I have the traces of our parents.

For example, recently, he was angry that he was still not familiar with the kitchen after ten years of acquaintance and eight years of marriage. However, he inherited his father’s good temper and did not want to argue with me, but he also stuck to his mother’s rough temper.

And when it all comes down to it, I’m afraid we end up living like our parents. From love to love in the trivial life gradually become a bitter spouse, but also can only say.

Could not help but see him clumsy in the kitchen, busy buying books to read, narcissistic anger, in women here, all become inattentive to life, inconsiderate to each other.

No matter what they wear to get married, marriage is the end of a chicken feather.

  • national flowers fall

Share everyone’s story with everyone vol.2
Dear friends, I am The mother of Sonvin. Thank you for your attention and help all the time. Your kindness and kindness have been reflected in your words.

You are all good people, good sons and daughters of your parents, good husbands, good wives and good parents of your family. It is a blessing for Him to have friends like you.

I want to thank my dear husband from the bottom of my heart by using the netease platform. Self sick since, thousands of day and night, are you night and day never leaving the care, tisanes, give or take an injection, do ideological work, you always said I was hard, now you do is should, want me to take good for illness, don’t let your lonely goose fly alone, you head of white hair, wrinkles are and some for me, although you younger than me, but you as a brother to care about my mind.

Dear, I thank you, if there is afterlife, as long as you want, we still do husband and wife!

59 – @ a6e444db0d490a12e29cd23b71e515 [netease Beijing mobile phone users]

My father has not been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer until his death, has not ruled out the possibility of cancer, also has been holding out hope.

Cook for more than three months, is too thin, can’t chemotherapy, had a puncture surgery and hospitalization 18 days, go home for nearly two months, but before the day of the visit, the first two said pain, I go to the hospital he don’t go, will stay at home, on the third day at night and he said, after a more than an hour, left lying on the sofa, nothing is explained.

His mother later said he had told her the night before that he might walk in front of her.

Dad left for more than 3 months, think of from his hospital to discharge to better state, and then to leave, the heart will be uncomfortable, from 18 years old to study and work for so many years, accompany him too little time, call not to say much, good regret… Parents in, life is to come, parents to go, the way home after life!

When I did the pancreas cyst puncture, I asked my doctor friend, and he said that the physical condition did not allow the operation, if you receive chemotherapy, the body may be unable to bear… When I went to get a death certificate, the doctor said it was less painful just to leave than it was to go through chemotherapy.

Many cancer patients think about dying every day. That was the only way I could console myself. At least dad was less tortured.

My brother later asked me if it would have been different if I had insisted on taking dad to the hospital instead of letting him stay at home. Dad walk at night, I could have a good hypothesis, please go to a hospital in the morning, 6:40 alarm clock (this alarm clock I didn’t delete) to the present, he is very calm say to indolence, back to me asking for the meat in the porridge to chop a bit, let me go to work, the morning call home in the afternoon, mother said to eat a meal in sleep, elder brother also call I get home from work, also spoke.

I always regret the last time, always said that he did not get up and walk around, also do not let him smoke, maybe smoking he will feel better.

I also regret that I didn’t take him to get dentures. In the last two months, I didn’t eat anything delicious. The last thing he had ever eaten was durian.

This month will go to the burial, the time to choose good, accompany him the last time is from Chongqing to chengdu he was invited to be buried. He died on the couch. They said the couch should be dealt with, but I don’t want to. I think he can lie where he likes.

— @sleep you MB get up hi

After the surgery for pancreatic cancer in the spring of 2016, I insisted not to take chemotherapy drugs. Now I feel a little uncomfortable and my face is often numb. I went to the pharmacy and asked the doctor to prescribe oral medicine to treat my face numb for a few days.

I came to Shenzhen from the countryside to work yesterday, but I still haven’t found a job. I have two children at home waiting for me to earn money to support my family, and I’m more than 100,000 yuan in debt to see a doctor.

The doctor said I should live no longer than five years, and hopefully in these years I can earn enough to pay my bills and leave some money for the children to grow into adults. I love my children, my home, my wife, my parents, my siblings and my friends, and if I can hold on for five years, the doctor says I’ll be fine.

I’m still on the road in Shenzhen. After a few days without a job, I went home to be with my parents and children.

I wish I could live a few more years and earn more money for them. The older kids are in second grade and the younger ones are not even two years old.

I love my baby, baby every call a father, I listen to is happy.

— @yihuohuo [netease mobile phone user of Qingdao city, shandong province]

In 2015, when I took the college entrance examination, my mother was diagnosed with a tumor. My father stayed with her for nearly two years and didn’t work much.

That year, When I failed the college entrance examination, my mother blamed herself all the time, saying that it was because of her that she distracted me and didn’t take good care of me. But I know what the truth is.

I went home in ’16 and spent an afternoon talking to my mom. It was a relief.

In the Spring Festival holiday of 17 years, I spent a holiday with my family and didn’t go out much. Envy my mother and aunt’s optimism, and my father’s kind of never abandon and strong. Also this holiday, from my cousin to know a lot of things I do not know, suddenly feel a little heartless.

I was 20 years old, 19 years old when I experienced something that Now seems ridiculous to me. I hope my mother’s health will be better and better in the future, and my father will be healthy all the time. I will work hard to become the person I want to be and make my parents proud.

  • month seems as long as three years