The “wealthy but three generations” is the embarrassment faced by many families. The Wang family of Langya in Shandong has crossed many calamities and withstood all kinds of tests, from the Eastern Han Dynasty to the Ming and Qing Dynasties in more than 1700 years, has produced 36 queens, 36 harnessed by the side of a horse, 35 chancellors (clearly recorded in the Twenty-four Histories), becoming the most prominent family in Chinese history. “It is appropriate to be slow in speech and good in heart”.
Words should be slow
“Words should be slow” is a secret book that Wang Ji received from an old man when he was transferred from a seventh-ranking governor to a fifth-ranking lieutenant in the Chang Yi kingdom in 77 B.C. Although he was the first grandson of Emperor Wu of Han Dynasty, Liu He, the king of Changyi, was a despotic and unpredictable man who was surrounded by villains who were all smooth talkers. In such a sinister officialdom, Wang Ji certainly felt very sad. But fortunately, he met an old man who guided him out of his funk and gave him the 3 words “Yan Yi Slow”. With these three words, Wang Ji actually survived one thrill after another, and gained a good reputation in the officialdom, and was appointed by Emperor Xuan Liu Xun of the Han Dynasty as an admonishing minister, becoming an important official of the court.
Talking reflects a person’s wisdom. Young people, in particular, often suffer in speaking due to their lack of life experience. In The Analects of Confucius, Confucius said this: “There are three offenses in serving a gentleman: to speak before the word is said to be manic, to speak without saying is said to be hidden, to speak without seeing the color is said to be goze. “
“To say something before it is said is called being impatient.” You are guilty of being impatient when you rush to speak when it is not your turn to speak. You are guilty of being “impatient”. Speaking is an art and must be done carefully. History is full of people who have been offended by saying the wrong thing, and even paid a terrible price. The word should be slow, that is, to tell us to speak after careful consideration before export, so that we can become more cautious, stable and calm, followed by the tone of voice to soothe, so that the listener will feel respected, friendly, more comfortable and smooth.
The heart should be good
The three words “Xin Yi Shan” were given to Wang Ji by an old man when he passed through Changyi again in 67 BC. It turns out that as his official position rose, Wang Ji developed the mentality of using his power to retaliate against his political opponents, and made them miserable and harmful. For example, Zhao Luo, the chief historian, was maliciously impeached by Wang Ji because of his political disagreement with him, and was finally dismissed from office and returned to his hometown, where he died of depression soon after. With the old man’s advice, Wang Ji changed his ways and stopped fixing people to harm them, but treated everyone objectively and fairly, and was welcomed by more and more people, and lived a smooth and safe life in the sinister officialdom. The old man who gave Wang Ji the six-word secret is said to be Gongsun Hong, a famous chancellor during the reign of Emperor Wu of the Han Dynasty.
It is desirable to have a good heart and to be kind to others, and you will be blessed. Mencius says, “A gentleman keeps his heart with benevolence and his heart with courtesy. He who is benevolent loves others, and he who has manners respects others. Those who love others will always be loved; those who respect others will always be respected. “A person with a good heart is willing to help others and save others in distress. People around him are willing to associate with him and more willing to help him. The Tao Te Ching says that there are no relatives in heaven, always with good people.
The heart should be good, it can generate the yang energy of people. We have a famous saying in Chinese culture: “Doing good is the most joyful”. The human psyche is very strange, we do any bad thing, the psyche will be uneasy, unhappy, inwardly wrong, this uneasiness wrong not to others, but to themselves, slowly face look bad, the spirit of getting out of shape. If you really do good deeds unconditionally and absolutely, help others, benefit others, and do a good deed, your mind will naturally be very happy. That happiness is not justified by reasoning.
These six words seem to be simple and plain, but they are full of the ancient people’s truths of doing things, from which we can see the heart of benevolence and the way to advance and retreat. If you can achieve these six words, you have a mature and atmospheric personality.