I remember when I was a kid, I was longing to grow up. Because I thought that when I grew up, my parents would no longer be able to control me. I can drink soda whenever I want, and stay up whenever I want, and that must be very happy.
When I did grow up, my parents were indeed out of my way, but the happiness I thought I had didn’t come. Although no one cared about my soda anymore, I found that the ideal was too insignificant. And, while I had this insignificant freedom, there was a new and greater lack of freedom. For example, if you come to work at eight o’clock, even if you are five minutes late, your boss will give you a look. And that face, much harder to see than the parents when I was a child.
So, instead, I began to miss the carefree life when I was a child, thinking that it seems to be happiness. At the same time, I started to have a new longing: When can we implement flexible working hours? It must be very happy, I can sleep as long as I want, no longer need to be woken up by the alarm, no longer need to run to the office without even washing my face and brushing my teeth.
Several years later, I finally realized flexible working hours. Not only that, as you become a senior staff, you can go to work at any time you want, even if you work from home, no one will say anything about you. However, I found that the happiness I expected at the beginning ran away without a trace. Because, as I grew older, there was no alarm, and I didn’t have the blessing of sleeping in the morning. The first thing you need to do is wake up at dawn and stare at nothing until dawn. Although no one requires you anymore, but waking up and working on time becomes a habit, and flexible working hours have nothing to do with happiness which!
Looking back on decades of work experience, I also found that every time I changed to another unit, there would be a supervisor who felt annoying and tended to find trouble with me. So, every time always hope that this supervisor transferred away, and stubbornly think: as long as this person transferred away, the work will be happy. There are several times, he does not go I go, here do not stay, there is a place to stay. However, each time will find, no matter where to? The various shapes and sizes of the supervisors against me are like a shadow. So began to look forward to: the day the daughter-in-law became a mother-in-law, to I can say, no longer subject to the supervisor’s gas, that must be very happy.
A number of years later, finally boiled out of the head: their own senior director, you can boss, let others look at my face. But I found that the happiness that I craved at the beginning still did not come. Because, although no one says anything to you anymore, but how to take responsibility for everything, big and small things have to me, how the heart is so tired? Moreover, how the surrounding people have become so hypocritical, they put a fart, others will say incense.
So, every day meetings, social engagements, listening to reports, layout work, busy as a gyroscope, I began a new vision: which day can live leisurely, do not care so much, want to fish on fishing, want to play cards on playing cards, do not have to look at so many hypocritical faces, listen to those fleshy falsehoods, look at those boring files, that is happiness.
The time flies, the turn of the eye retired, really no one wants me to take any responsibility, when the annoying phone calls no longer call, the court is really cold to the saddle, all the time belong to their own, but I found that the original desire for happiness where is what happiness, is simply the cold and endless loneliness of people leaving tea.
So, sitting alone under the waning sun, began to think about life: my life, from childhood to adulthood, from old age, all think if how, tomorrow will get happiness, but why in one wish after another, happiness still did not come? This is when one really understands the saying, “The past mind is not available, the future mind is not available.”
Everything is actually in the present moment.
If you feel that the present is not happy, and you always think that happiness is only when it has changed, or that the past is happiness, then I’m afraid that it will be difficult to have true happiness for the rest of your life!
Isn’t it? The future has not yet come, and the past has already passed. If we don’t seize every present moment, don’t take it seriously, always thinking about the invisible tomorrow or yesterday that is already far away, we will always live in tension and loss. As life slips away, in the end, all we can leave behind is three words: “empty sadness”.
Therefore, if you want to know whether you will be happy in 20 years, in terms of personal state of mind, look at the current state of mind can be known: if you feel happy now, 20 years later should also be happy; if you have too many things pinned on tomorrow, 20 years later, these wishes whether or not to achieve, you may not feel real happiness.
The logic is simple: desire is never the source of happiness, but the root of all suffering. Once a desire is satisfied, a new one will immediately arise, just like me, after satisfying the desire to drink soda at will, the desire to sleep will arise again, and so on and so forth, endlessly.
So, remember the above lesson, happiness is in the present, in your hands every day, even every moment, and never in the past or the future.