My young mind was struck once in elementary school when I felt a big blow at the Time. The teacher who was teaching OU had a comment that the girls with less hair were the smart ones. Then the class teacher asked him to evaluate the girls in the class. The teacher said that when it came to me, she had a lot of hair. I retorted, “How do you know if Madame Curie has less or more hair? I have forgotten the teacher’s reply. But the embarrassment I felt and the inferiority complex I felt at that time are still vivid in my mind.
The school I was attending at the time was a place that was as busy as many other elementary schools in Shanghai teaching AoM. Each grade was divided into A, B, and C classes. The children who were valued by the A class teachers had many privileges: for example, they were allowed to stay out of classes other than math and science for a long time while preparing for the competition. The teachers talked about their favorites in front of the class with pride in their eyes, and the slight disdain for the non-competitive students that came out in their words is still in my mind. The result later was that I was afraid to meet the OU teacher I spoke of at the beginning. When I saw him from a distance, I preferred to hide in the ladies’ room.
My middle school is a famous school in Shanghai and even in the whole country. Because it is a foreign language school, the campus Culture is actually very open and democratic compared to other schools. Every year, there are seniors who are accepted to Ivy League schools. In this school, competition results are finally not a measure of a child’s intelligence. But every midterm and final exam is still class and grade ranking. Students who were always in the top of their grade, who won prizes in competitions, or who excelled in other activities were always envied by their classmates because their “overall ability” predicted the possibility of going to a world-renowned school in a few years.
At that time I kept working hard, but I was still filled with the legendary students who didn’t have to work too hard to be at the top of their class and didn’t miss out on any of the activities, held various presidencies in the student council, had a bunch of research projects, were proficient in various languages, or were strong in mathematics and chemistry. At that time, the legendary XX seniors were described as “cattle”, “sacred cattle”. In fact, it’s interesting to think that we use animals to describe those students we consider superior.
The difference between “smart” or “dumb” seems to be a natural division of people into three, six or nine. Society recognizes this culture and calls it meritocracy. It has many obvious and rigid criteria at the student level, such as grades, experience in various activities (also called leadership leadership), etc. At the top of the Food chain are the people who are born with high IQs that are unattainable. Nowadays, there is even no shortage of people who have both IQ and EQ. Even if these people are modest and low-key, it is still difficult to hide the halo on their heads.
I thought that after experiencing the American high school culture, I should finally get rid of the cult of IQ that I had developed since I was a child, because I found that even those athletes who are disdained in China as “simple-minded and physically advanced” also have admirable perseverance, self-discipline, teamwork and many other virtues. But I don’t know if it’s because of my own experiences growing up, or because the United States, ironically called “anti-intellectualism”, has a special love for “smart kids”, GPA, leadership, and a new look.
After arriving at the academic Princeton, the number and quality of smart people around me jumped several levels. Surrounded by the smartest people in the world, I often found an extremely smart math major who was also one of the best dancers in school; a frat guy who drank at night and got an A+ in physics the next day; a biology student who wrote an article that won one of the most promising international literary awards. Later always have to sigh, really high IQ people can really do anything ah. In this case, my mom and dad came up with the “mindset theory” and taught me that I can only be happy if I have a good mindset. However, as you know, the phrase “be in a good frame of mind” sounds like the words of comfort for losers. It seems like since you can’t, then take a step back and be in a better frame of mind and worry less.
Many people who are asked why they want to go into investment banking or consulting or etc etc have a very strong reason: they want to be with smart people. Yes, being with smart people can really stimulate your brain and spur you on not to fall behind. More importantly, many people feel that they can’t communicate and interact at all with people who are not smart. This is really not entirely from arrogance, in fact, speaks to the troubles of many elites. Because there is a lot of specialized language and symbols among smart people, they extract some more “basic” words and concepts from various disciplines and fields to help them express their intentions more concisely and clearly in daily Life. It is very difficult for people who have not read similar books and courses, done similar internships, or had a university-like Education to communicate with them unhindered. More importantly, smart people are often interesting, they have traveled the world, read books from Islam to quantum mechanics, and met people from academics to business leaders. With them, I often have the feeling of “listening to you is better than reading 10 years of books”, and I often have the feeling of “why is the gap between people so big”. So I got used to this look up to smart people and the inevitable dissatisfaction and inferiority of myself. The reason why I exclude myself from the definition of intelligent people in the article is because I really feel the gap between the really intelligent and capable people I see. Of course, there are people outside of people, outside of heaven, outside of high IQ and high, the comparison is never ending. Even though many people say things like “grades are not the most important” and “IQ is not as important as EQ”, they can’t avoid lamenting the indelible advantages of people who have fast brains and strong logic skills and can solve problems with a brush.
However, in recent times, I finally seem to gradually begin to understand the above-mentioned “mindset” two words really mean. Mindset, broken down, is the attitude of the heart. What is the attitude of the heart? It is the calmness of composure in the face of all situations. It is an inner strength. It is something that cannot be measured by intelligence or emotional intelligence. It is true that many intelligent people with their high IQ can be very confident to face many situations, but when the fate of some things outside the control, or even completely outside the human, I am afraid that the strength and resilience and IQ, and even with the emotional intelligence are not much related. On the contrary, there are many ordinary people who do not seem to have superior emotional intelligence, or even less vulnerable than ordinary people, but in front of the mockery and blow of fate, take care of others, and even save the day.
So I wondered, “What is the strength of these people?
My application essay for Princeton University that year was titled ther person i admire. Zheng Bing had only a junior high school education, and by many standards, I’m afraid she didn’t even fit the word elite. She founded a farming association and acted as her own guarantor to introduce advanced fertilizer loans to many farmers. But unexpectedly, the farmers could not repay the loans, and many even deliberately cheated to make a profit. So Ms. Zheng Bing had to grit her teeth and pay back the loans that were beyond her ability. At that time, she was just a rural elementary school teacher, and was hospitalized after a car accident when she was exhausted. Under such circumstances, she still gradually made up the money. Later she also cooperated with Mao Yushi to set up a microfinance institution. I asked her why she continued to help farmers with their loans after being cheated by them? She said, in fact, she did not understand exactly why, but just felt the urgency to find ways to help farmers, because farmers have too few options.
At the end of the article, I asked: How many people dream of changing the world, but how many people still hold great hope after the heavy blows of reality? Even if they are cheated and hurt by the people they want to help, can they still hold on to that ideal they had at the time?
I got hooked on break dance this year, and liked a crew called ill-abiliities. The dancers in it are all so-called “disabled”. But even if they lacked a leg or hearing, the dancers inside were still able to make all kinds of freeze, windmill, and other power moves. More importantly, their model is really too dashing. I can’t help but smile at the provocative look of the battle. In a classic breaking battle video, there was a dancer with prosthetic legs who jumped to the point where his pants fell off to reveal his boxers because of the intense action. The people in the audience were all funny and moved.
Okay, so even if you don’t have legs, or can’t hear the Music, but still want to make the most powerful movements and show the coolest model?
Probably, this is called the mentality. Whether you are in an advantage or disadvantage. Is at the peak of life or low. How many cards in your hand, how much talent and talent God has given you, and whether that heart can beat steadily. Can you think of others in your most painful days; can you redefine your Dreams in the most impossible situations; can you smile sincerely at the world in most cases, giving joy and hope to those around you, even if you are inevitably beaten by sweat and tears when you are alone.
Such a person, even if he or she will not make history, will not tour the lecture circuit, will not enter the hall of famous schools, and will face the real trials and tribulations even if there are no creative and logical solutions, but still can persevere through with the will.
I read a great quote today we come across an individual whose synthetic smile has replaced genuine laughter, and whose sense of dull despair I think for me, I have never experienced what genuine pain is, the feeling of waking up in the middle of the night soaked in cold sweat. I think the inborn did not give me extraordinary intelligence and emotional intelligence, may be to give me a more urgent need to cultivate a strong heart.
The first time I saw this was when I was a teenager. I once thought he was saying that teenagers are pretentious, but now I realize that he may really be lamenting the fact that teenagers have never experienced real darkness and pain. I’m afraid this lament is a kind of helpless envy. So I’m afraid this article is just a “teenager who doesn’t know the taste of sorrow”.