Mang Fu, a severed finger abandoned by The Times

1

When I was very young, I thought relatives had a fixed look. For example, grandmothers are thin, maternal grandmothers are fat; Uncle is a tall, take me to shoot birds, catch cricket; My uncle was much more honest and honest, and always asked me what I wanted to eat. And all the relatives, as they are called, like to push each other, to pay the bill, to give lucky money, to give gifts.

‘Why, what are you doing?

‘Oh, take it!

When I moved to the city, I didn’t see my relatives more than a few times a year, but in elementary school, I seriously asked my classmates if their grandmothers were thin and their grandmothers fat. I don’t remember the answer, but the discussion seems to end up with a paper bounce.

My mother always said, “We are all good people, filial, dear, are good people.” I think she’s right. However, the only flaw, is three uncle.

My grandfather’s family lived in the qiqihar village, which was far away from Daqing. It took me two hours by train and one hour by car. Every time, three uncle will tease me, play the forehead, pretend to catch me. I remember him laughing, his face creased, his hands hard and rough. What I remember better is that he lost a finger on his right hand, half an index finger, to be precise.

I once took advantage of him to chat, trembling around the kang corner, to observe this broken finger. The gap was round, like a piece of meat belly, and it moved very flexibly, except that when you clenched your fist, there was a lack of follow-up action. Three uncle found me in the look, a little close, turned around to smile, I saw the folds of his forehead full. Ever since, I’ve been so afraid of him, when people ask me, I can’t tell you what.

Other than that, the days in grandma’s house were very pleasant. But the rural toilet also make me panic, three uncle gave me a way, go to vegetable garden pick a place to solve, this let me relax, also some good to him. Three uncle also kill chicken, kill goose, take stove fire roast corn, roast potato, took us a few children to the river fishing fish. I was happy, but never forgot my fingers.

Until high school, my mother accidentally chat up did not say, that is three uncle cut. Three uncle go to school, and others bet, lost, was ridiculed, others to coaxed him to say: “Don’t so cowed, admit your mistake. Who want to three uncle picked up a kitchen knife, “Kuang” a sound, cut off the index finger. A circle of people dumbstruck, three uncle shouted: “To ah, this next you satisfied?”

No one dared to say any more, but by the time my mother and the other uncles arrived, his severed finger was irreparable. At that time there was no way to get a limb together, but the loss of a finger did not delay the work, so it was settled. No one took it to heart, but only left a complaint: “The third brother is too tiger, too impulsive, such a rashness since childhood, the future can be restrained.”

My mother told these stories without expression, but I was too shocked to speak. Since then, then go back home, I have to admire three uncle – dare to cut off their fingers, not everyone has the courage.

In the grandmother’s house, the third uncle is not promising. Small uncle is the richest, is the first college student in the village; Second uncle has several repair shops; The aunts had married away, and were townspeople; My family in Daqing, is also a city dweller, even the farthest uncle was sent back to Shandong when he was very young, I heard that there is a business editor. But uncle Three? The house he built is still near the homestead of grandpa, sharing a courtyard, house money is brothers and sisters together, planting the land of grandpa and grandma, there is no sideline, for many years did not hear the meaning of going to the city. And in the hometown, did not go to the city is nothing promising, keep in the hometown to do what? My mother said: “Three uncle filial piety.”

Indeed, in my third year of junior high, my grandfather died, and we hurried back. My grandfather stopped in the middle of the yard, three uncle busy back and forth, eyes red, until after the first seven, he did not sleep well, the whole night with my grandmother. Uncle is not in, uncle two as the eldest son in mourning, led kowtow.

Later I knew that at that time, the third uncle and the second uncle had broken off. During the summer vacation of my second year in high school, I found that my two uncles did not communicate with each other at all. My mother and several sisters talked about this contradiction, and I suddenly realized that there were also conflicts of interests between relatives. Just as I grew up knowing that my grandmother’s fatness and thinness were completely random, my childhood stereotypes were torn apart and mashed, shattering my worldview.

Three uncle say: “I have no business with the second elder brother, you don’t blind mix.” My mom whispered, “Why are you hiding at dinner?”

I do not understand, just worry, three uncle so filial piety, so righteous, so tiger, will do adverse things. As it turned out, he did, and the result was the same as the amputation finger — not hurting anyone but himself.

2

Northeast people, ancestral home in Shandong more, the so-called “chuang Guandong”. From the Qing Dynasty to the present, famine, war refugees and gold-digging adventurers poured out of northern China. Shandong, the most densely populated province, took both land and sea routes to establish itself in the vast northeast.

The great famine of the late 1950s drove my grandparents and grandparents out. Grandpa: They had distant relatives who left and took the train without too much trouble. My grandfather took the hardest road all the way from Heze in the southwest of Shandong province, hitchhiking, ticket evasion, walking and begging for food to Heilongjiang. After settling down in the qiqihar countryside, he begged and avoided being sent back as a “blind stream”.

Grandma told me that during the key period of settling down, she dragged my aunt to the kang tou of the village party secretary’s house every day to sit there for a week without saying much, just looking forward to seeing people eat and live. It was not until the secretary waved and grandma bowed down from the kang that the matter was settled.

My mother was the fifth of seven children in grandma’s family. In those days, there was only one mud house in grandma’s house, and several children were crowded on a kang. Later, when my uncle was born, I had another one in the west and had to live there.

At that time, grandma used to feed chickens, ducks, pigs, vegetables and children whole day. Seven children ran all over the floor, waving their hands and reaching the bottom of a table of sorghum and sweet potatoes. My grandpa had read some books. Besides farming, he also thought of other ways to make money. In winter, he bought New Year goods for reselling, wrote Spring Festival couplets for the village and collected bits and pieces of money.

They lived in poverty, but the two old men sent each of their children to school, a rarity in the village. Everyone said, “Shandong people are fastidious.”

Big uncle is the first in the family to read the high school, also took the college entrance examination, less than a dozen divided into the shifting line. After the exam, he came home with the report card in his hand. With tears in his eyes, he begged his grandfather to let him study for another year. Grandfather is silent, uncle heart will understand. A month later, Uncle was sent back to his hometown in Shandong province, where a relative had retired in a bearing factory and was looking for someone to take over his job. Since then, Uncle has been far away from northeast China. In more than 30 years, he came back only five times, two of them after his grandfather died.

After uncle, no one read to the high school, my mother dropped out of junior high school, the most intelligent second uncle, also just graduated from junior high school, until the very intelligent little uncle read, the family did not have too much burden, just read all the way to the third year of high school, took the exam to shenyang agricultural college, became a serious city person.

By the time he was in college, I could remember him sending back pictures of his family in military uniforms, holding both hands, and the villagers looking from side to side, saying, “Tut, the first college student in the village. Your family will be happy in the future.

Third uncle is the lowest education of all children, after primary school did not read. He was notorious for fighting and the school refused to accept him. Since childhood, three uncle is bullying brothers and sisters naughty brother, my mother remember very well, a big uncle lesson three uncle, three uncle does not listen to, also want to hit people backhand, was big uncle command tied up, tied to the tree, three uncle shouted curses, spit on them.

Many children, grandma can not control, let them grow. Birthdays are also many, can not remember, who birthday arrived, to grandma that said, the day boiled an egg, calculated. Three uncle greedy, every year reported twice birthday, grandma sometimes dizzy, cooked, after the reaction came over, “You just last month?” Three uncle said: “that is the solar calendar, this is the lunar calendar.” The words were laughed at for a long time.

Three uncle in the protection of their loved ones, but also not ambiguous. When someone bullied his sister in primary school, he would rush over and fight with each other recklessly, so frightened that no one dared to provoke him. In the village, there is a student who is still a grade, bullying others, the age is small, always strong grab food, three uncle with a stick chasing him to fight, finally the children home run to our village, to find grandpa to discuss.

Slowly, the elder sisters married out, the eldest brother in Shandong, three uncle and two uncle became the two left in the old man’s side. At this time the third uncle no longer irritable, he began to farming, also in others to help learn welding. Introduced by the matchmaker, three uncle married with the village aunt, aunt beautiful, when the marriage, the family are very happy. Grandmother had been most worried about his uncle, afraid of trouble, then also felt, “married, steady, will be on the right track.”

The third uncle stayed in the countryside, eagerly looking at the preferences of The Times, cut a gap between relatives. The third uncle stayed in the countryside, eagerly looking at the preferences of The Times, cut a gap between relatives.

But the expected course was cruel — to stay in the countryside, to look eagerly at the preferences of The Times, to cut the gap between relatives.

How much money can you make from farming? Ten mu of land, three or four thousand yuan a year. In winter, the countryside in the northeast is no joke. All the heating is done by ourselves. Kang and stove are connected into core heating facilities, and the temperature of minus 20° C can freeze everything — bowls, plates, thermos bottles and televisions.

Coal is so expensive that every family burns straw and corn cob. If it burns too much, every two years we have to break open the kang and dig out ashes. Otherwise, the heating efficiency is low or the kang is simply burned down. Straw burning fast, people sitting next to the fire mouth, to use the hook to keep fiddling, lane after a while will be a face of ashes. My mother looked forward to living in the city when she was a child, and at her youngest and most beautiful age, there’s nothing more frustrating than a dirty face.

The third uncle built a tiled house next to the earthen old house in the old courtyard, which was once the most prominent symbol. But when the tiled house was completed, he was also in debt. At this time, the little uncle graduated from the university began to subsidize the family income, two months of wages more than he planted ten acres of land a year’s income. Although our family income in Daqing is not high, but in the hometown is also important. When I was a child to cousin, that is, three uncle’s son described the appearance of the toilet, “living in the high-rise people use the toilet, but high, press the button, a flush, clean!” Cousin listened straight stare, ask three uncle, “dad, have you used?” Three uncle dry smile once, once irritable good anger, launch malicious to chop off his finger three uncle, walked away.

3

Ever since I discovered the conflict between my third uncle and my second uncle, I have often wondered what my relatives think behind everything I know.

Every year three uncle busy busy, in the old yard, pumping water, pick vegetables, kill chickens, set the table, like the master, the occasional back relatives together. Everyone said three uncle filial piety, said that is this, but there is no doubt that all around the little uncle around.

He was the first to use a combination lock, the first to use a cell phone, the first to buy a digital camera, the first to bring a laptop. Children, of course, it goes without saying, to play mobile phones and snacks, adults also play cards to call small uncle proud. Everyone said: “We also win a college student, let him bleed during the New Year.”

The little uncle came back, and stayed a few days, and went away in two or three weeks, and everybody remembered what new things he had added, and whom he had been close to. Three uncle let all people eat well, settled, finally left, everyone clearly and secretly told: “Third brother, you can down-to-earth point of life, well, life is not easy, ah?

When I was in the third grade of primary school, my third uncle couldn’t sit still. He and his second uncle went to Daqing together and lived in my house. That was the first time he came to Daqing.

Second uncle opened a small clinic, quietly, give him a cup of tea will say “thank you”, third uncle’s hands are full of calluses, do not know where to put, often use simper instead of all polite.

Second uncle and my father said, they think about breeding ostriches, now have a good policy, animal husbandry must be better than agriculture, ostrich eggs, ostrich hair, ostrich meat, are the baby. My dad said the policy is good, but the cost of this thing is also too high, who to invest? There’s no answer. They came to Daqing for a week, but the ostrich plan came to nothing.

In the late ’90s, it was agriculture programs that could be used as a means of financing, but rural illiteracy has its benefits. At the very least, they get stuck in the ostrich scheme at the most impulsive of times, and thus escape the “grand Afforestation”, or the “God of Ants”. The fund-raising scam at the two star stations ruined tens of thousands of people in northeast China.

Later, three uncle has gone to Shenyang, Beijing to do welder, during the work, he took a photo in front of Tian ‘anmen, on the photo, three uncle eyebrows lock, doubt and helplessly looking at the camera. Several jobs did not save too much money, but let three aunt very dissatisfied. Big summer, she a person borrows tractor everywhere, irrigate, weed, the end also did not come over busily.

Later, the third uncle did not come out, the couple bought six cows, and a new contract some dry land. The cows were confined in the backyard of grandma’s house, where firewood used to be piled up, and where chickens and ducks once belonged, all were staked and troughs were placed, and the six cows were barely squeezed. Three aunt wear sleeve, scarf, every day with a fork fork grass, in the evening a head out, sent to the village milking station.

The milk station has only been built for a short time. The equipment is semi-automatic. The breast pump clamps the nipple and takes it off in ten minutes. Three uncle is also quite happy, think raise a five years, can earn a cousin’s university expenses.

That year, my cousin finished the college entrance examination and was admitted to a school in Zhengzhou. Do the school feast, the whole family to the county, get more than 20 tables, three uncle and three aunt also went, cattle on the yard. Wait for them to come back, three aunt screams, she saw a cow tied to a post, the body is all soft, has no breath. The cow was caught in two circles, trying to get free, but the more she twisted the rope, the tighter it became, and finally strangled herself.

Ten thousand yuan for a cow, who had been milking for three months, died, and the rest was spent in vain. The money to raise the cow was borrowed. A year later, the cattle were sold, three uncle and three aunt noisy news spread to our home.

Three aunt cry, say three uncle drink too fierce, three uncle then curse, say aunt and total riotous man. My mother say: “this return what, this not end?”

Relatives wanted to help them. Small uncle took two people to Shenyang for a period of work site, but three uncle grandma a person in the yard, went back in autumn. My father works in a plastic granule factory, the three uncle to work, workers complain, said three uncle a person always drink, noon can drink a kilo, drink to curse. No way, and back home, because the aunt went to the ballroom to dance, two people hit each other, the grandmother to see a jumpy. At this point, all hands are tied.

My third uncle’s son, my cleverest cousin, was their only hope. When I was a child, I went home to play chess, and he could beat me in half a month from learning nothing. When I played poker, He won more than I lost when I explained the rules. My little uncle always said that the next generation of our family can produce a lot of people better than him, cousin is the most promising. Three uncle two people quarrel again, the thought of cousin, all endure down. However, my cousin on the high school grades straight line decline, the middle of the night to my QQ, said: “Brother, I always miss her, how to do?” Later, he skipped class to go to the Internet bar to brush the night.

Finally, the cousin college entrance examination in a complete mess, only into a provincial specialized subject. Three uncle suddenly collapsed, cousin’s feast, he has been stuffy to come, sort out the money, three uncle fell down. He was hospitalized for half a month with gastrointestinal bleeding. When he came out, he picked up the bottle and poured it into his mouth. Nobody could stop him.

After that, my aunt didn’t want to stay at home any more. She spent the best part of a decade watering the fields, feeding the pigs, raising the cows, and caring for her drunken uncle. Now, she has no concerns, go out to work. A person in Qiqihar, then went to Harbin, through a friend, to Guiyang as a waiter for half a year. Three uncle drunk news also kept coming out, there are a few times aunt back, two people and shouted to divorce. Poor grandma, in fear and trembling, stood by her most worthless son.

4

When I was in college, I went back home. The third uncle was still the most different.

He was poor, drunk, and his family was a mess, but he was more active in organizing family gatherings and getting his children back to the elderly. Every holiday, he would call each family, can’t come back he is impatient. The impatience spread to me.

Another cousin admitted to the school in Wuhan, as usual, admission banquet. Table, I and a few Cousins sitting uncle that table, three uncle big hand waved, “a few children, are full of wine, ah, this bottle of white wine you pack.”

“Do not drink white”, cousin said: “Three uncle you drink less.”

Three uncle facial expression changed immediately, did not speak, picked up the bottle to pour into our cup. Second uncle and small uncle stopped, did not stir up.

“Du Xiuqi you drink first, one by one to come, college students, give everyone Lao two.”

I froze for a moment and sat still.

“Three uncle, I don’t drink white wine.” I said.

“Lie to anybody. There’s not a kid who doesn’t drink, and doesn’t drink hard at school. Today three uncle let you open up, come, respect these elders a circle.”

I ao however, picked up the white spirit to stand up, “a few uncle, hard you, I salute a cup.” “Say that finish, I took a sip, put down,” everyone eat good drink good, I withdrew the table.

I turned to leave. Later cousin told me, three uncle gas all over the tremble, but other uncles a chatter, playing sloppy in the past, cousin cousin are also quickly removed.

Mang Fu, a severed finger abandoned by The Times
When I was about to graduate, my mother called and chatted with me. I asked, three uncle how, she suddenly said, three uncle is in our house? Say that finish, let three uncle answer the phone.

“How is Sookie? Is it all right to be out by yourself?” “Asked uncle Three.

“Good”, I said, “when did uncle Three come? Stay a few more days.”

It was my father and ready to open a breakfast shop, let three uncle to help, at least have some wages, can also look at him not to drink. Breakfast shop opened for half a year, three uncle every day under the eye, also really drink not so much. But it was too tiring to make breakfast. In winter, I had to get up at 3 or 4 o ‘clock in the morning to knead dough, wrap wontons and steam steamed buns. Finally, the whole family could not bear to make them any more.

Three uncle said, aunt has been working in Harbin, want to go to see. A week later, I called my mother and found that her voice was not quite right and asked what was wrong.

“Your three uncle bai, but also how” she said: “from our house not to go? Go to your aunt. Then they’ll tell you they’ve gone off with another man and grabbed your aunt drunkenly to jump into the river with them. Your aunt called for help, someone passing by called the police, and they were taken to the police station overnight. And now they’re talking about divorce.”

“Quit, then,” I said.

“From? Can you get away from it? Which time don’t say want to leave?”

After that, my aunt went to Guizhou. Half a year later back, and took the third uncle went to Harbin, it is in the kitchen to find the following piece of work, a package to eat a package, a month 1500 yuan. Did not do for a long time, three uncle and drunk in the dormitory, curse, was beaten by the young man in the room, can not continue. Back home, back to drinking.

The next year, my parents took him to Daqing and bought him a shoe-brushing shop. My aunt came, too, looking as if she was determined to live a better life. After three months and more than 8,000 yuan, everyone was relieved. Did not expect the landlord to see good business, tear up the lease, oneself do, compensate 5000 pieces of liquidated damages, let three uncle move out within 10 days.

At that moment, my aunt said she was going back to her mother’s house, and went away. Five days later, she came back wearing a mink coat. Three uncle ask, how to buy this thing not to say 1 with him? The aunt said: “All these years for the children, but also did not buy for yourself, finally buy a piece, but also have to report to everyone?”

That night, three uncle cleaning house, accidentally found aunt’s ticket, is the night before arrived, three uncle rage, questioned aunt. Two people big quarrel, the aunt moved gas, blurted out, “Yes, is yesterday came back, last night and the landlord went to KTV to sing one night song, do you care?”

I don’t know exactly what happened next. All I know is that my third uncle went out for a night of drinking, and I couldn’t get in touch with him the next day. My mother worried, to find three uncle, found that people were not in, the aunt angrily also went back to his hometown. The third day, the whole family are ready to report to the police, three uncle suddenly made a phone call to my mother, said: “Elder sister, I am at the station, I go back to find za mother.”

My mother said, “Don’t move. Just stay there. I’ll find you.” She took a taxi to Daqing station, turned around in the waiting hall, no one, and went to the ticket office, see the corner, three uncle ragged, squatting sitting, full of alcohol. My mother went over and asked, “Where’s your ticket? Let me see.”

Three uncle waved his hand and said: “I don’t know.”

My mother crouched down and searched his pocket. Her cell phone and ticket were still there, two hours later. A handful of change in her pocket added up to less than 100 yuan. But the ID is gone.

“Where’s my ID card?” My mother asked.

“Three uncle eyes empty, said:” I don’t know, sister, I don’t know.

Finally my mother in the ticket window there took back the ID card, then three uncle bought a ticket did not take the ID card and went away. My father then arrived, two people returned the ticket, carrying three uncle back to my home. After the wine, three uncle washed a bath, eat a meal, do not speak. Live for three days, aunt to call, let three uncle back.

“My dad asked.” Is it still possible?” Three uncle sighed and said, “I’d better go back.”

The same day, three uncle went away.

5

Three uncle and aunt still did not divorce, even after so much. I don’t know if it’s the kids. Cousin read junior college time, every time go home, pass by my home, live a night. All the people who have met his cousin, can not stop praise, “this child is so good”. The subtext is, “It’s a pity I’m not a good parent.”

My grandma has a bad temper, so many years did not kua who, but mentioned cousin, always said: “the child is polite, will talk, in the house eye there is work, hands and feet never idle, really good.

Later cousin in Harbin to find a sales job, rented a single room, from dawn to dusk. My aunt followed and worked as a waitress in a nearby restaurant. Three uncle did not go, do not know whether Harbin brought him too painful memories. My mother asked cousin, “do you want to persuade, let your father also come over? Three to take care of, isn’t it good?” Cousin said: “Gu, I also want to ah.” My mother wouldn’t dare say anything more.

WeChat group rise, the person of grandma’s home also pulled a, call “till courtyard”. A group of children in it to grab red envelopes, several uncles and aunts take turns to give health chicken soup. Three uncle on the voice, sometimes drunk, curse; Sometimes not drunk, said some unlucky also not to listen to the words. No one answers, sometimes small uncle will answer, “say this is not pleasant to hear, don’t say”, but useless.

I run outside all the year round, seldom watch the group, never listen to the voice. One day, I clicked on WeChat and suddenly wanted to know what they were talking about. I found a nickname called “rebirth” of the people, even sent a lot of voice, a listen, just know is three uncle.

Listen to three, is that people should be filial, people can not forget their roots, people want how. I call my mother, ask: “how is three uncle?”

“Just drink. What else can you do?” She said, “Why is the wine so good? To destroy a man like this?”

I am momentarily speechless, wants to say, three uncle this is not only because of the bar, but refrained. Chat for a while and hang up. I suddenly think of three uncle when young, with four and a half fingers to cut wood appearance.

I used to think that amputation was a symbol of his courage, but times have changed. That “courage” and strength have depreciated, and so has he.