Let’s talk about the chicken baby thing

Another month has passed, you can come out to get some air. June 1 is coming, let’s talk about the chicken baby thing.

Ma Xiaobing eyes to the third grade, many friends curiously asked me, your family is how the chicken baby? In fact, my family is not really how chicken. If you follow the standard of the center of the universe education Haidian, basically equal to no chicken.

As the saying goes, “Three years old look small, seven years old look old. “From early on, I have a sober judgment: Ma Xiaobing is an ordinary child, IQ in the normal range, emotional quotient wavering – in front of outsiders, especially girls very high, in front of relatives is almost zero –Academic performance is boxy, but occasionally there is a sudden single needle bottoming out, up never appears. Playful and active, focus on the weak side in short, right, his school ecological bit is in the come and go …… oh no, is between the slag, bully. All aspects of the performance parameters, are the middle value.

I have always felt that the chicken child is about teaching the child according to his or her ability and going with the flow. What dual quotient of the child, what the family situation, give him what kind of education. The reverse quotient of strong chicken, learning does not match the position, in the end, but is the moon in the water. Bodhi ancestor has said: “The moon in the long sky, there is a shadow in the water, although see, just no fishing touch place, in the end only into the empty ear. “Even the Monkey King listened to say:” do not learn, do not learn. “We modern people always have to be more perceptive than the monkey.

In addition, my daughter-in-law and I belong to the lazy type of personality, but also no energy of the chicken child, more or less the meaning of the casual encounter. So far, only a total of three classes have been enrolled for him.

The first class is soccer.

Ma Xiaobing was born interested in spherical objects and liked his father the most when he was a child. After his father succeeded in losing weight, he switched to soccer. As early as the middle class of kindergarten, I took him to enroll in a soccer interest class in a nearby park. At that time, Ma Xiaobing was like Lu Bu, running across the green field like nobody’s business. His old father was standing on the sidelines and was filled with suspicion: “Could it be that my son Feng Xian…blah blah blah, could it be that my son Xiaobing is a soccer genius like DaKongYi? “

The coach also said, your son in the hobby class is a pity, do you want to move to a more formal training team? I listened to the good, rushed to sign up. Once in the team only to find that there are too many good seedlings, Ma Xiaobing and others a comparison, not to mention Lu Bu, almost the reincarnation of Admiral Pan Feng.

The good thing is that he has two advantages.

One is that he listens to the instructions and implements the tactics firmly. He is playing fullback, the biggest problem for children playing fullback is that they can’t stand loneliness, they can’t help but go up to the wind, and the defense line appears open. But Ma Xiaobing always honestly stay in the defensive position, how the forwards do not see the limelight, willing to have no presence, can be called the green field bass player. The second is that he is good at messing up, don’t look at the belt can not, bad others a top three things (not limited to the field of soccer). No matter how fast the opponent’s forwards are carrying, he can always insert a foot from a strange angle to destroy the ball, I can’t hold it, no one can hold it.

Ma Xiaobing this skill, is born with. There were many times when he touched a random hot key on the keyboard or on the remote control, and it took me half a day to recover the original state.

On this level, Ma Xiaobing is not Lu Bu nor Pan Feng, but Cao Ren. Cao Ren is the fill-in general of Cao Wei, never in the frontal battlefield, but always quietly provide security for the frontal battlefield. Fight Lv Yu, Liu He, deadlock Liu Bei, Han Xun, fight Tian Yin, guard Jiangling, Fancheng. His task is not to destroy the camp and cut the general to break the formation, but to maintain the battle line in the worst case without degradation, so that the main force to win the opportunity to adjust.

Back to soccer.

The reason why he was allowed to play soccer until now, not intended to take a professional route – the level is still far from – but one of the simplest reasons: health.

Ma Xiaobing’s eye axis is long and prone to myopia, and the only way to slow it down is to be outdoors. Their school is not allowed to go out between classes, and sports activities are limited, so they can only find remedies from soccer training. Ma now trains three days a week for two hours each time, with an additional two hours + three games on the weekend. Although he is now tanned like a piece of charcoal, not worse than Zhang Fei, and can be angry with Bao Zheng, but so far he is not wearing OK glasses, thank goodness.

Soccer training to a semi-professional intensity is also very obvious for physical improvement. Ma Xiaobing is so physical that after each game, he has to run around the field with his buddies, and when his buddies can’t run anymore, he goes to tease the seniors. Once after training, he ran next door to the senior team to run laps with them, and soon overtook everyone to cross the finish line. The coach was furious and cursed, saying that you can’t even run with the lower grade beanbags, so give me five more laps! Ma Xiaobing just basked in the hatred of the eyes, smugly running back to the rest area.

I painstakingly told him that the wind will destroy the wood, he waved his hands and yelled: “I am the wind ah ah ah ah ah! The trees are blown off”, and ran away again …… its stubbornness so.

Next sports scores are getting higher and higher in elementary schools. Now his big ball is not worried at all, casually playing is a full score, jump rope swimming also has physical support, only then pick a small ball specifically to practice skills, this piece of the score will be stable.

Of course, this is not the most important thing, the most important thing is to be healthy. For parents, the health of the child is the greatest blessing.

The second class is piano.

When you read this, the corners of your mouth must have turned up slightly, saying that you are not exempted from this. Let me explain.

Actually, I had no intention of letting him learn piano. The piano training for young children nowadays is too inwardly rolled, there is a cultural performance, our class teacher let the students report talent, specifically admonished: “If it is the piano do not report. “Why? Because there are just too many people learning to be competitive.

I have seen too many untalented children forced to practice by their parents, both sides are suffering, and why bother. But I still let Ma Xiaobing practice piano, why?

First of all, the premise is that he is interested.

His mother was familiar with music theory and found that he understood it quickly and had a feeling for it. Except for the painful correction of his hand shape, he had a lot of fun all the time. As a counter-example, his old father still can’t tell if he’s playing in three or four beats. I often ask him, “Do you think it’s fun to play the piano? You can stop if you feel bored. “Every time he glares at me: “Why don’t you give me the phone, Dad, that’s more fun. “I slap the lid of the piano: “Keep practicing. “

The second reason, in fact, is also the most important reason: Ma Xiaobing first grade, downstairs moved to a piano teacher. Not a general reference to the downstairs, is the right downstairs. Teacher level is very high, and our relationship is also good. I simply put one at home, the teacher’s lessons only need to climb a floor, sometimes the children themselves directly downstairs to her home lessons, very convenient. The children don’t have to travel long distances, and the parents don’t have to sit in front of the door.

Living close to her has another unexpected benefit. In order to avoid disturbing the neighbors, Ma Xiaobing practices between the time she gets home from school and dinner, when the teacher is also home. Sometimes when Ma Xiaobing was playing by himself, the teacher called from downstairs: “Hey, you played that note wrong. “

This should be considered a kind of cloud teaching it ……

The first thing you need to do is to get a good idea of what you are getting into.

The teacher asked me before the lesson: “What are your expectations for your child to learn the piano? I said, “I don’t need to take a grade, I just need to be able to play. The teacher said, “If you can play, that’s too broad. I tilted my head and said I don’t know anything about music theory, but I just hope that when he grows up and goes to a party, he will see a dusty piano in the corner of the room and walk over to it and play and sing a song. The teacher sneered: “Amateur, right? You think the piano and play and sing is easy? I slapped the lid of the piano and said to Ma Xiaobing: “Continue to practice. “

The teacher persuaded me once, saying that your son is still talented, he should take a serious examination for a grade. I said talent is also graded, what level of talent is he considered? The teacher blah blah blah said a series, I said I do not understand, can not be replaced by the three warriors to analogy? The teacher did not pay attention to me. I said what about the king? The teacher said between gold and platinum. I heard, said forget it, do not force him, see his own. If he is willing to take the test, then pay the appropriate effort, think clearly.

He hasn’t chosen yet.

So now Ma is taking one 40-minute piano lesson a week, (and cloud lessons through the wall), and playing for half an hour before dinner every day. This amount of practice is not enough to get results, and can really only be a hobby. But the good thing is that he now loves to listen to all kinds of piano music and discusses the details of playing it with his mom.

I took him to the dentist last week and there was a piano in the dentist’s office. He was bored while waiting for his appointment, so he ran over and banged on it for half a day. The nurse at the front desk came over and gave him an ice cream.

I can see that learning the piano is still useful!

The third class was a small facilitator class.

It is said to be a small presenter class, but it is actually an oratory class.

Ma Xiaobing’s language was average, which made me unable to hold my head up in front of his class teacher.

I have studied carefully, the root cause of his poor language is not careful reading, reading is not careful performance, is always forgetting the word. The solution is to let him read aloud, which is the dumbest and most effective way to solve the language problem. But he is very resistant to do so, every time he reads in the throat humming, can not be released. The reason for this is that he lacks the desire to express himself internally, or more commonly, he is not dramatic enough.

This aspect can not be solved at home, a discipline him, he will sit on your lap sobbing and writhing. The ancients talked about easy son and …… uh, teach, so his mother enrolled him in a small facilitator class to create an environment where everyone around him had to speak loudly.

This class doesn’t involve too much energy and is only an hour and a half a week. The class is held in a shopping mall, and every time he is thrown into the classroom in advance, my daughter-in-law and I go hand in hand to watch a movie, any movie. Even worse movies are better than taking the kids, except for “Hotel Sunset”.

After a period of training, I realized I had made a big mistake. He became more and more of a barbarian at home, often rousing, all learned from reading press releases in the facilitator’s class. But the benefits are obvious, the language test scores have improved, at least the words are not so childish.

So parents, if you think your child’s language is not, you may want to find someone from outside and try to let him read aloud.

At present, Ma Xiaobing is on these three classes, one more is not. There is really no time. The school’s curriculum plus these three, basically Monday to Friday all full. I try to do my best to arrange two half days free on Saturday and Sunday to take him out for free play.

There is a child in their class that I met the other day and asked where did you go on your May Day holiday? The child looked gloomy and said aggressively that he didn’t play. I asked him again, it turned out that he was busy with three training courses every day during the holiday, and he even had to practice oral arithmetic or vocal music in the car in the middle of the course. For him, school is considered a break, mention the holiday is afraid. I can’t say anything about other people’s children, but it hurts to hear it.

Of course, I can’t say that the parents are wrong, maybe that child’s future achievements are far above Ma Xiaoyao. But I believe that if you follow the same method to train such qualifications as Ma Xiaobing, it will certainly not work. I still say: strong chicken against the quotient, it is difficult to meet expectations; learning does not match the position, ultimately pointless.

This brings us to my future planning for Ma Xiaobing.

In fact, just two.

One is to grow up, he can have a serious job to earn money by craft. It does not matter how much you earn, the point is to pay a return, the formation of positive feedback, which is part of the social identity, very important.

The second is to dig out a deep hobby, anything, the premise is not harmful to health, do not give others trouble. This hobby must be his heartfelt love, to be able to indulge in a day not out. Whether it’s playing chess, Lego, doing gumbo, or being a mage. No matter what sadness you encounter outside, once you are busy with your hobby, you will forget all about it.

Adults need a space to escape and lick their wounds from society’s beatings.

If you can do these two things, that’s enough for parents. As for how far he can go in the future, just let it happen, no need to deliberately force it.

I had a dream at night during the time my grandfather died.

This dream was very wonderful. A large luxurious living room, a white-haired old man sitting in the main seat, next to a large number of relatives and friends around, taking turns to wish birthday, very lively.

My perspective was floating in the air, like a spirit. Somehow, I knew clearly that the old man is the late Ma Xiaobing, and the achievement is very great, so the birthday banquet was extremely grand, the community came to congratulate.

After three rounds of wine, the gray-haired Ma Xiaobing greeted the guests and walked trembling to the study next to him. There was no one in the study, and he sank himself into a chair, sitting dumbly, his eyes looking at the ceiling.

I knew he couldn’t see me, but I couldn’t help shouting, “Stinky bore. I didn’t expect the old man to hear me, and instantly lost his composure, got up, and eagerly searched all over the house, while looking with a crying voice: “Dad? Mom? Where are you? “

At that moment, I felt connected to him, and clearly felt his feelings. His mother and I passed away a long time ago, and for so many years, no one will call him by this nickname. A old man who has gone through all the vicissitudes of life and is ready for great glory, what he desires most is to hear his parents call him “Stinky Bore” again.

I would like to shout again, but I’m awake. This kind of wish, after all, can not be obtained.

After I woke up, I ran to his bedroom and sat on the edge of the bed for a while. I thought, “Forget it, forget it, whatever it is, let’s just be happy and spend his childhood with him. This is the last time in his long future life that he will be able to spend time with his parents and be close to them.