Jilin TV a mediation column called “long Time no see” long face, because the recent broadcast of a program of the content, so that “long time no see” in the microblogging once discussed very hot. It also made various netizens emotions once very high.
What exactly is the content of this episode that has such a magical power?
Let’s find out.
Long time no see, want your Life
Seeing each other is a bit more quality than reading each other
According to the content of the program, Ms. Zhu has been away from Home for fifteen years, her husband Mr. Zhu repeatedly unsuccessfully retrieved, so I hope that with the power of the media, his wife will be brought back to his side.
Why did the wife leave home?
The reason is simple, domestic violence.
In Ms. Zhu’s memory alone, Mr. Zhou has committed four serious acts of domestic violence. One of them, simply because of the problem of burning footwash, made Mr. Zhu feel that he had lost face in front of his relatives, so he used his fists to “defend his dignity”.
However, it was not only violence that prompted Ms. Zhu to leave home.
Mr. Zhou is a gambling addict, unmotivated, a seven-foot man, and no official job. In addition to this, Mr. Zhu also has “elegant”, preferring to drink alone, every day at home can drink half a kilogram of liquor.
A man should “cultivate his body and Family“, Mr. Zhou “cultivate his body Mr. Zhou has a way of “cultivating his body”, and he also has a way of “making his family”. In order to do everything smoothly at home, Mr. Zhou at home to implement military management, wife and children, but any mistakes, you have to punish standing. Home is like a sand field to point troops, so powerful.
In such a bad environment, Ms. Zhu could not stand it, and finally left home to start a new life.
Mr. Zhou also in their own “elegant good” under the augmentation of half a pound of wine a day to drink themselves into paralysis. “Sick and anxious to think of the old feelings”, one way or another, Mr. Zhu wanted to find his wife back.
After the program team’s “efforts”, Mr. Zhu finally found Ms. Zhu’s residence.
Outside Ms. Zhu’s home, the location host and the program guests first “double ghost pat”, persuade Ms. Zhu to come out and meet with Mr. Zhou. Ms. Zhu’s attitude is firm, the words have been said, no matter how determined not to see.
Seeing this, the guest of honor threw out the killer – “for the sake of the children”, but still could not persuade The guest of honor threw out the killer – “for the sake of the children”, but still could not persuade Ms. Zhu.
When Mr. Zhou saw that there was no movement upstairs, he decided to go on an “imperial expedition” and asked his cousin to carry himself to Ms. Zhu’s door and persuade her personally.
But Ms. Zhu still closed the door, the outside host in order to break the deadlock, began to give Ms. Zhu on the yoke: “people come all the way to apologize, you do not even give a chance?
In fact, the meaning is “even my face are not given?”
A female guest also helped: “You have to face bravely, you hide is not a matter! “
Both hard and soft, after the two techniques of fire and ice fruitless, Mr. Zhou despondently ready to return, but the seeds of “hope” did not extinguish in the heart of Mr. Zhou, he said he would never He said that he would never give up his wife, for love, to make efforts, to be strong.
Finally, in a harmonious and gentle Music, the program ended slowly.
This is such a program, but actually appeared on the TV screen in a dignified manner.
The program team cruelly brought the culprit of Ms. Zhu’s misfortune in front of her, dismembering her life once again.
Ms. Zhang Chunru, a famous scholar and author of The Nanjing Massacre, once wrote in her book that “forgetting is a second massacre”.
For the victims of domestic violence, “to be searched is to be hurt again”.
But for the program team, it seems to be a natural political correctness to “persuade peace”, which is like This is like a strong twist of “Marriage with the yin”, which is like a cold arrow poking the victim’s heart.
However, is Jilin TV’s “Long Time No See” the only one that does this?
Chinese style mediation
According to the State Council’s “White Paper on the Status of Chinese Women”, domestic violence is the reason for one out of every four divorce applications in China. Among the victims of domestic violence, women account for more than 90% of the victims.
Since the proportion of domestic violence families is so high among divorcing couples, mediation for domestic violence families should also be a top priority.
These mediation programs are not only an exposure room for domestic violence crimes, but also a showcase for mediators.
For example, Guizhou TV’s “Mediation Live” program.
In a 2019 episode, it talked about a Ms. Wen who sought a divorce because her husband, Mr. Liu, had domestically abused her.
After Ms. Wen and Mr. Liu got married, Mr. Liu then wanted to charter a cab to run a business. Because Ms. Wen had money on hand to pay for her children’s schooling in the future, she refused Mr. Liu and an argument broke out between the two.
As a result, Mr. Liu took the way to solve the quarrel actually resorted to violence, not only slapped Ms. Wen hard, but also put a knife on Ms. Wen’s neck to threaten her life.
After seeing the simple and effective way of violence, Mr. Liu’s attitude towards Ms. Wen changed dramatically and became more rude and impolite compared to the past.
In order to buy a car to pull the job to make money, Mr. Liu decided to sell his and Ms. Wen’s only house. Ms. Wen did not agree, Mr. Liu actually threatened to jump off a building. The idea is that if Ms. Wen does not pay, then the responsibility for the loss of the child’s father will be carried by Ms. Wen.
Ms. Wen was forced to agree, and the house was finally sold for 210,000 yuan, but Mr. Liu only gave Ms. Wen 18,000 yuan.
All kinds of things accumulated together, Ms. Wen broke her heart and decided to start a new life. But Mr. Liu didn’t seem ready to give Ms. Wen that chance, and he insisted on making up.
At the scene, in full view of everyone, he even kneeled down to Ms. Wen, meaning “I am kneeling down to you, you will quickly forgive me”.
The face of the resolute Ms. Wen, Mr. Liu no way. It does not matter, the mediator has a rut, “when she lost her temper, the more you embrace her the more she can feel love”.
After some persuasion, after seeing Ms. Wen swayed, the program team came up with a killer, a painting from her daughter. The painting also succeeded in making Ms. Wen change her mind and promise to give Mr. Liu a chance.
For the sake of the child
There is also the program “Gold Mediation” of Jiangxi TV.
One of the installments tells the story of a mommy and daddy man who begged to get back together after domestic violence against his wife.
Usually the husband, Mr. Bian, and the family of origin contact a lot, big and small things like to report to their mothers, over time the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law do not get along, the mother-in-law thinks Ms. Zhao is not smooth, Ms. Zhao also look at the mother-in-law is not good.
In a daily conversation, Ms. Zhao said a few words to her mother-in-law, which turned out to be contrary to Mr. Bian’s dragon scales. Subsequently, Mr. Bian began to beat Ms. Zhao.
Mr. Bian also hit harder and heavier, a choke on Ms. Zhao’s neck, almost let her suffocate.
In desperation, Ms. Zhao fought back with a knife, cutting Mr. Bian’s hand with the knife and severing three of his blood vessels.
Mr. Bian, who was cut by the knife, woke up instantly, but his next move was not to call the police or an ambulance, but to call his mother and sister.
The mother-in-law and sister-in-law also lived up to their name and came to help. As soon as they entered the house, they beat up Ms. Zhao.
Afterwards, Ms. Zhao also went to visit Mr. Bian, who had injured his hand, for a time, but was unexpectedly scolded by her mother-in-law again. Desperate, Ms. Zhao decided to leave this sad place and start her life over.
But the program team found her and pulled her back into the memory of domestic violence.
Not only that, these gold mediators, with a huge sense of “responsibility”, tried their best to persuade the two to reconcile.
One guest was even able to “see the light” and see that Mr. Bian still had One guest was even able to see that Mr. Bian still had “good bones” and could give him a chance to start his life over.
The most violent, however, was an episode of Shanghai Entertainment TV’s “The New Old Lady”.
Ms. Qian has long suffered domestic violence from Mr. Huang, with light verbal abuse and heavy handedness. After an argument, Ms. Qian was actually beaten by her husband until she was hospitalized, and had no choice but to resort to the law, resulting in a two-month jail sentence.
Mr. Huang did not only hit his wife, but also his own daughter. Because of her husband’s hobby of stock trading, and often lose money, Ms. Qian had to put the family’s savings in her daughter’s custody, but unfortunately her husband knew about it. After unsuccessfully asking his daughter for money, Mr. Huang finally moved against his own daughter.
On the show, Mr. Huang face aggrieved, said he was angry, “slapped her a few times. “
However, in the subsequent connection with his daughter, his daughter broke down emotionally and loudly denounced his father for lying, and was actually locked in his room by his father, holding his hair and beating him on the ground.
In the face of the audience’s strong voice, Mr. Huang also has his own set of logic, such as “his wife’s mother’s family disrespect for their own”. “wife loves money and does not work”, “daughter makes himself angry “.
Even in his opinion, his wife, who was sobbing on the show, was “acting” and the bruises from the beatings were applied by her with cosmetics.
Unbelievably, in the face of such “anti-human” atrocities, the program still upholds the The team still upholds the attitude of “it is better to demolish ten temples than to destroy a marriage”. The advice given is to “not mention old things and live well in the future”, hoping that the two The two of them are “to let go of the past suspicion, to be with each other until old age”.
To be honest, the top ten Chinese TV channels and their local channels combined can probably watch 500 years of mediation programs.
In a social environment where traditional values are under attack, the social function of the media changes, and television transforms from being a disseminator of information and a bystander of conflicts to being an active participant and resolver. If we look at the social environment, the social responsibility of the media, the needs of the audience and the needs of the parties involved, we can find that mediation TV programs are a type of programs that have been active on the screen in recent years.
In addition to the aforementioned oddities, there are also Tianjin TV’s “Love Defense War”, Chongqing TV’s “Say It Out Loud”, Zhejiang Minsheng Channel’s “Qiantang Old Maid”, and countless others.
The paper I found on the Internet explains the endless number of mediation programs in China like this.
“Mediation TV programs resolve conflicts between parties through mediation of common conflicts and disputes in people’s daily lives, promote traditional socialist moral concepts and moralize audiences, while also making up for the shortcomings of other means of mediation and adding to the construction of a socialist harmonious society. It also makes up for the lack of other means of mediation and adds to the construction of a harmonious socialist society. “
It is true that there is no denying that some mediation programs do play a regulatory role, the final ending of the happy family.
However, if we look at what Peach said earlier, there is a conflict between the entertainment nature of television programs and the purpose of dispute resolution, the narrow range of types of disputes mediated by television programs, the emphasis of mediation reasoning on morality, the lack of inculcation and dissemination of legal knowledge, the lack of protection of the privacy of the parties involved in television mediation programs and the fact that television programs mediating disputes can bring some negative social effects. “
The most typical is domestic violence.
Xu Anhua made a movie called “Night and Fog in Tin Shui Wai” in 2009.
This film in the “God-making movement” rise of Douban evaluation is not high, 7.5 points, but the director Ann Hui and actor Ren Dahua, together with the construction of a domestic violence The most realistic state.
The film tells the story of a family of four living in Tin Shui Wai, a slum area of Hong Kong, who were brutally murdered by the husband of the family, Sam.
In the eyes of others, Sam is an ordinary person, although a bit quiet, but not a big evil people.
In the home, he is a tyrant who moves to his wife and daughter with fists and feet.
When his wife Xiaoling did not speak to his liking, she was either thrown out of the house or beaten.
When his wife really wanted to flee the house with the children, Sam would mobilize all his emotions to get her back in order to soften her heart and come home.
He would kneel in front of others to his wife, saying he did not dare, next time will change.
He would even cut his stomach with a knife in the street to show his heart of atonement.
But when his wife really believed him and thought he would really repent and life would start to change for the better, the demon who abused him would come back to life at home.
At the end of the movie, director Ann Hui put “pure fiction” on the screen.
But the film is not empty wind, but adapted from the real events, the Tin Shui Wai family tragedy.
Reality is often more brutal than movies.
On April 11, 2004, in Tin Shui Wai’s Tin Heng Estate, renovation worker Lee Pak Sum brutally murdered his wife Kim Suk Ying and his two daughters on that day.
Prior to the tragedy, Kim Suk-ying, who had been habitually domestic abused, had actually sought help more than once.
When a social worker came to visit her home two months before the murder, Kim Suk-young told the social worker that her husband was going to kill the whole family, but did not receive a response at the time. A few days later, Kim Sook-young asked for help again before being placed in a shelter.
Two days before she was killed, she was beaten again and then called the police in desperation, but the police officers in Tin Shui Wai, with the attitude of “I would rather tear down ten temples than one marriage,” made a big deal out of it. However, the police officers in Tin Shui Wai also took the attitude of “I’d rather tear down ten temples than one marriage” and made it a minor issue. But at the insistence of Kim Suk-young, she and her daughter were once again placed in a shelter.
On April 11, before she went home, she repeatedly asked for a police officer to accompany her, but was refused. The poor woman had to return home alone with her daughter, but when she opened the door, she was greeted by Lee Baeksun’s butcher’s knife.
The evil man is always a logical one, in all domestic violence, all beatings are for a reason, whether it is “disrespect for the mother-in-law”, or “This woman only looks at money”, “She didn’t give me She didn’t give me face”. The core of all the sophistry is the phrase “those who obey me will prosper, those who disobey me will die”.
What they want is unlimited obedience, and the means is endless violence. Therefore, there is only a difference between once and countless times of domestic violence.
Domestic violence has its own complexity, and it is because of its complexity that it is not resolved in a “final approach” in the mediation section.
Most mediators are still in the spirit of “peace at the end of the bed”. The majority of mediators still try their best to bring broken families together with the attitude of “it is better to tear down ten temples than to destroy a marriage”.
But what they don’t understand is that after the domestic violence, the family has been shattered and any adhesive has lost its effect. If the powder is forcibly reconstituted, what you end up with is a freak that no one wants to see.
Domestic violence cannot be a family dispute; it is already a criminal act under the Law of the People’s Republic of China Against Domestic Violence, which was introduced in 2016. For these domestic abusers, the best mediation room is not the living room of the elders at home, not the office of the neighborhood committee, not to mention the TV screen with non-stop commercials during prime time, but should be a cold prison cell.
It’s 2021, I hope China will have less of these netherworld programs.
Shi Qun. Research on China’s mediation TV programs in the context of social transformation [D]. Hunan University, 2014.1-61.