For today’s young people, it may only take one hospital bed stay to get used to being taken care of and learn to take care of their Parents, relatives and lovers.
Staying in bed is an important lesson for young people to grow up and stop calling themselves “babies”. In the hospital, you can see the most vulnerable side of your loved ones, and even be ready to part with your Life at any Time, under such pressure, we have to force ourselves to be strong.
At the same time, accompanying the bed also makes people seriously think about what to do for the Family in the future, how to take care of their parents, and how to improve the family’s resilience to risk.
Uncle today to share with you three 90-year-old bedside stories, their bedside age, family situation varies, this bedside experience to their lives have brought a great change.
The following are their real bedside experiences.
The only daughter became the family’s support
@LiMengYao female escorting bed when she was 27 years old and stayed in bed for half a month
In July 2018, I received a call from my mother on my way to work, saying that my father had broken a bone on the bus last night and was waiting for surgery, and that if I was free I would go back to see.
It was a Monday, and I was late getting up. I was even more anxious when I got the call, raising my voice and complaining about why my mother didn’t tell me earlier. My mother’s voice on the phone was thin and weak, careful, saying that she was afraid of disturbing my sleep last night. I immediately took time off from work and booked a high speed train ticket.
On the way, I called my mother again and asked how my father was injured. My mother said that last night, my father got on the bus and went to the back row of empty seats as usual, who knew that a cab suddenly stopped in front of him, and the bus driver slammed on the brakes. The father did not stand still, his body fell backwards to the ground and could not move at that time.
The bus driver called an ambulance and took the father to the hospital, where he underwent a series of tests and was diagnosed with a fractured lumbar vertebrae, requiring surgery to implant steel nails to support the broken bones and help with recovery. The doctor said it was fortunate that the cervical vertebrae had not been injured, otherwise he could have been paralyzed.
My father, who was tall and in his early 50s, had always been physically strong and had done all the heavy work in the house, and was the “mountain” of support for our family. Now this mountain has fallen all of a sudden, a sudden change that made my mind go blank.
When I arrived at the hospital, my father was already in surgery, and my mother and I waited anxiously at the door. It was hard to wait until my father was pushed out, his face was pale, his lips were dry and cracked, a tube was inserted in his nose, and he was covered with a white sheet.
I will never forget that moment when my father, who was so tall and strong, now became fragile and helpless.
When my father saw me, he squeezed out a weak, feeble smile, as if to say to me that he was fine, don’t worry.
I couldn’t hold back my tears, and they came out in a flash.
The next six hours were a dangerous period in which I had to abstain from Food and water in order to prevent vomiting caused by the residual anesthesia in my body. When I saw that my father’s lip was cracked and bleeding, I used a cotton swab with some water to gently wipe it.
The doctor asked my father to stay awake and asked my mother and me to talk to him more to help him overcome his post-anesthesia sleepiness.
I was speechless for a moment, not knowing what to say to my father.
During the years I worked in Beijing, my relationship with my parents became more and more distant, and I always refused to come back with the excuse that it was not good to buy tickets when I was so close to Home. When I went home during the holidays, I mostly did not talk to my father.
After seeing the bigger world outside, I felt more and more at odds with my father’s outlook, feeling that his ideas were old-fashioned, narrow-minded and ridiculous. Every time I communicated with him, it would end in a fight. My father was not good at arguing, and every time he couldn’t beat me, he would just let out a long sigh and go back to his room and close the door behind him.
Once upon a time, I was so proud of myself for beating my father in a debate, but now, with my frail father lying on the hospital bed, I realized that it was really superficial and childish to play fast and loose with my family.
At that moment, how I wished he could speak as usual with a full voice, even if he said the sun was coming out of the west, I would never argue with him.
After my father passed the dangerous period smoothly, the tubes were removed from his body, leaving only the infusion tube in his hand, and we needed to take care of his food, drink and food.
Because of the suddenness of the incident, my mother didn’t have any necessities with her when she went to the hospital, so I went home and brought my lunchbox, toiletries, and a change of clothes with me, and went to the kiosk in front of the hospital to buy a cheap plastic potty.
Since he couldn’t get out of bed, he couldn’t wash properly. Washing his face was fine, just wipe it with a wet towel, but not being able to brush his teeth was hard for us, my father already had plaque, and if he didn’t brush his teeth for a few days, when he opened his mouth, there was a bad smell within half a meter. I bought a bottle of mouthwash to solve the problem of my father’s inability to brush his teeth.
In the first few days, I noticed that my father always did not drink water and ate very little. Every time my mother and I came back from a meal, a large portion of the meal was left over. I urged him to eat more so that his bones would grow faster, but he always stammered that he was full. Later, I asked my mother to know that my father was embarrassed to urinate and defecate in front of me, so he could only try to eat and drink less.
So, I went out with various excuses, and every time I came back with some of his favorite fruits and snacks, carefully maintaining my father’s “dignity”.
During this period, I also helped my mother deal with the accident compensation issue. At first, the bus driver wanted to clear his own responsibility, and let my father say that he had fallen down the stairs accidentally. Both parents were workers, honest all their lives, and did not understand the twists and turns of this. Fortunately, my mother asked me in time to get the bus company and the traffic police brigade involved, and everything went through a reasonable and legal due process of compensation, and we eventually got about 15,000 yuan in compensation.
During the half month I spent in bed with her, I seriously thought about the way forward.
After graduating from college, I chose to go to the big city like most young people, but after working for a few years, the morning rush hour subway, frequent moves, and all the unpleasantness of sharing a room, gradually wiped out the dream.
My parents repeatedly urged me to go back to my hometown to develop, but I refused. Although all I had was a mundane job, I wanted to stay in Beijing and escape my family and familiar social circle.
Now, I couldn’t escape. As an only child, I was the only one my parents depended on, and it was time for me to take over from my father as the family’s “pillar of support As an only child, I was the only one my parents depended on, and it was time for me to take over from my father as the “support” of the family.
After my father was discharged from the hospital and went home to recuperate, I went back to the company to apply for separation, just as the rented house was about to expire, so I left Beijing. Relying on my work experience in a big company in Beijing, I found a job with a good salary back home.
During this period, I not only took over most of the household chores, but also had to help my father with various matters, such as negotiating with the bus company for compensation and helping him apply for a medical discharge from his unit.
My father used to love to go out for walks, but now he has to stay at home to recuperate from his injuries, picking on my mother at every turn and throwing tantrums like a child. At this time, I had to take on the role of persuading my father and comforting my mother while trying to maintain peace and harmony in the family.
A year later, my father recovered well and successfully completed the surgery to remove the steel nail. The surgery left a thick and long scar on his back waist, which also gave him a serious psychological shadow, and he would rather pay for a taxi than take the bus again. In order to facilitate my father’s travels, I took advantage of my work to get a driver’s license and bought a small scooter to be his “full-time driver”.
After the death of my father, I decided to take the editorial
I was 14 years old at the time of my father’s death, and I was in bed with him for about four months.
My father was a college student in the early 1990s. After graduation, he went to work for a leading local state-owned enterprise and reached a middle management position in his 30s.
Unexpectedly, at a time of great success, his future and our family’s hopes were dashed by the sudden onset of leukemia.
At that time, I was still in junior high school, my mother was not well, and she was at home to take care of the household chores, usually grandfather accompanied my father in the hospital, and every weekend and holiday, I went over to help.
The most terrible thing about terminal illness is that it often crushes the patient mentally before it physically destroys him or her. With his hopes dashed by day-to-day pain, my father became very irritable and did not want to take care of anything in the house except for his treatment.
One time, the family’s plumbing leaks, my mother and I went to the ward to accompany, try to ask my father if there is a familiar plumber, my father immediately shouted: “I am dying, not in the mood for you to do this! “
Mother was very aggrieved by the yell, two eyes with tears, grandfather saw this, hiding outside to smoke, and I looked on in a daze, do not know what to say. It took about ten minutes before my father snapped out of his rage, ate the fruit my mother had cut for him, and asked a few questions about my schooling.
I vividly remember being called to the hospital by a phone call from my grandfather one weekend after I had done my homework, and my grandfather was on the sidelines packing things up and letting me talk to my father, help pour water, and call the nurse. I had wanted to talk to my father about something in class, and after a few intermittent sentences, he listened indifferently, and I had no motivation to go on.
My father had no energy to speak at that time, and his eyes were not quite able to open, but he just gently held the zipper of my shirt with his hand and shook it, obviously fond of me. Later, I learned from my father’s colleagues that my father was most concerned about me. When he was just diagnosed with leukemia, he would always stand alone at the window and stare, occasionally sighing longingly
A “child is too small”.
The patients next to me teased me, asking me how old I was and whether I had a girlfriend at school. My father’s eyes were closed and he grinned silently.
The retired civil servant in the bed next to my father was in a good mood and gave me a few carrots, which were not very common at that time, but I could not taste them.
A bedridden patient needs to be turned in time to avoid bed sores, so my grandfather and I helped him turn over, one holding his head and the other pressing his leg, being very careful not to touch the indwelling needle inserted in his elbow. My father was already very thin, and the pants of his hospital gown were so empty that an old man and a junior high school student could easily turn his body over.
I put the glass of water with a straw in it and put it to his mouth. He swallowed very slowly, and had to make several efforts to swallow a mouthful of water, and after drinking a small half-cup, he slowed down for a while, shook his head, and asked me to take the glass away.
He taught me to mash the eggs with a spoon, mix them into the rice porridge, and feed them slowly to my father. As the spoon tossed in the bowl, the egg yolk slowly melted into the rice Soup, stirring up the faint smell of eggs.
My father glared at me in annoyance, and Grandpa took the bowl and spoon from me and sat on the edge of the bed to feed him little by little. I tried to observe Grandpa’s movements, but I could never learn how to feed my father porridge anymore.
That bedtime was the last day I spent with my father. At 1:00 a.m. that night, my father stopped breathing due to multiple organ failure.
I didn’t have a father anymore.
After my father’s death, when organizing his belongings, we found another hospital’s medical record and bill, and realized that my father’s desire to live had been so strong that after the attending physician informed him that his condition had deteriorated, he had hidden it from my mother and me and begged my grandfather to accompany him to an unknown hospital to try herbal treatment. That day grandpa called me to the hospital just to pack up my things for transfer, so I could go and give a hand to help. Unexpectedly, he passed away that night.
My father was the breadwinner of our family, and after his death, we were no longer a well-off family and had to live frugally. The good thing is that I got into a good teacher training school in the province with my own hard work.
When I was about to graduate from college, my classmates were thinking about whether to go to work or to continue their Education, at this time, I always remembered that when I was a child, I went to the hospital to accompany the bed, and the civil servant patient in the next bed talked about his higher reimbursement rate of medical insurance, and I could never forget the envious eyes of my father at that time. At that time, I only had a vague concept in my mind, but now, I already know how to choose.
A job in the codification, in critical moments can provide a personal protection, but also can save the fate of the whole family.
In order to take care of my mother, who is not well, and to make my future more stable, I gave up the exam and returned home from the provincial capital to become a secondary school teacher, ready to join the army of the exam.
Just out of school and into the ward
@Ziwei was 23 years old when she accompanied me to bed for 3 days
In 2016, my boyfriend and I graduated from university together, just out of the ivory tower into society, we feel new to everything outside. However, before the novelty had passed, a surgery pulled us into reality.
The first one was the size of a green pea, but as his body grew, it grew to be about the size of a sage fruit.
Initially, the painless pink tumor did not cause concern. But during that time, his boyfriend felt a stinging pain when he touched the pimple, and that’s when he panicked. It became a thorn in his side and he was often in a trance, but he hid his emotions so well that I didn’t even notice.
One day, just after I got home from work, my boyfriend suddenly said he had to have a minor surgery. It turned out that he had secretly gone to the hospital for a checkup without my knowledge, and the doctor said that the powder tumor was compressing the nerve and recommended immediate removal.
“On the way to the hospital I was worried that it was a tumor cancer type, I was prepared for the worst. If incurable, I will learn from the heroes of the Korean dramas you watch, disappear, never drag you down. “
He smiled playfully and said it lightly, but I hugged him and bawled.
We have never been to the hospital alone for surgery, in the spirit of the principle of reporting good news and not bad, my boyfriend did not tell his family about it. Therefore, we both did everything by ourselves, from registration to hospital procedures, and consulted the hospital staff if we didn’t understand something.
The operation didn’t take long, but the two hours were like two days for me.
The door to the operating room opened in front of me, and I saw my boyfriend in a wheelchair being pushed out by the nurses, and tears fell from my eyes. He was alive and well before, but now he was in such a mess that it made my heart feel like a knife.
Back in the hospital room, I was still crying. The boyfriend is a bit overwhelmed, he pressed one hand on the wound gauze to stop bleeding, one hand still has to be free to wipe my tears.
I guess to keep me from worrying, he pretended to be fine and said: “After the anesthesia, it didn’t hurt at all, I was separated from the doctor by a curtain, although I couldn’t see, but I could feel the scalpel cutting my flesh one by one. After the tumor was removed, the doctor asked me if I wanted to take a look, I took a look, and our cat was cut off about the same size, a small mass of flesh and blood. “
He meant to make me laugh, but I cried even more.
The nurses and patients in the same room laughed at me for making a big deal out of it, laughing and exclaiming that it was good to be young.
During the night, the nurse came every hour to check his temperature, so I couldn’t sleep well at all. When my boyfriend couldn’t exert himself on one leg, I helped him go to the bathroom, helped him get food from the cafeteria, and took care of him when he was having trouble moving around.
It was as if we had become an “old married couple” overnight, with each other’s vulnerabilities exposed in front of each other. This made me realize that love is not only about romance, but also about supporting each other in times of trouble.
Three days later, my boyfriend was discharged from the hospital, but he was still walking around with a crick, and it took him a week to return to normal.
Although it was only a minor surgical operation, it was a headache for us who were just starting out in society. The first problem was the cost. My boyfriend was still on probation and the company did not pay his social security, so he had to pay for the surgery and hospitalization out of pocket.
To add insult to injury, because of frequent leave, my boyfriend’s probationary period did not pass, the economic pressure made us anxious, but soon figured out that the body is the capital of the revolution, as long as the body is healthy, money will always be available.
After my boyfriend was completely healed, there were no after-effects except for an ugly scar on his thigh. He immediately picked himself up and went to look for a new job. Having learned from his mistakes, this time he chose a larger, more formal company that was able to pay social security to probationary employees.
Through this minor surgery, we realized the importance of savings, and that in addition to working hard to earn money, we must learn to save and manage our money so that we can increase our risk tolerance.
Today, my boyfriend and I have entered into Marriage. I am no longer the little girl who loves to watch Korean dramas and cry, and he is no longer the teenager who has a terminal illness in his head, but our relationship is as passionate and stable as ever.
I think it is possible that the surgery taught us many things. No matter how bumpy the road ahead is, with each other by our side, we will be able to be fearless.
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