You’ve researched the topic thoroughly, you’ve prepared well for the presentation, and you’re dressed appropriately. But when you do speak to your audience, you find them indifferent. Is the problem the meaningless filler words that are interspersed in your speech?
“Well,” “for example “, “that”, “you know”. Phrases like “you know” all sound lame and lack authority. Worse yet, people who use these phrases often feel badly spoken or even incompetent.
“If you use [filler words] repeatedly and excessively, it makes people feel like you’re not well prepared. ” says Paula Statman, a speech coach in Oakland, California, who often works with corporate clients after promotional events. But most people don’t even realize they like to use filler words at all, or that this behavior can undermine their communication style.
But it’s not too late to become aware of the problem. Experts say there are ways to remove these redundant words from everyday conversations and enhance the clarity of spoken expressions.
Diagnose the problem
Don’t expect this problem to be a breeze to fix. Trying to reduce the amount of filler words used will take months. First, many people don’t realize that they are using filler words, much less that they need to remove them from their sentences. While most people know not to say “um”, few realize that using “That’s right” or “you know ” is also unnecessary.
Public speaking experts say that people tend to add extra words to their sentences when they think deeply, so it’s hard to realize they have this problem.
Are you unsure if you have this same problem with verbal expression? To diagnose this problem, have a colleague or friend clap their hands when you use filler words. This may seem a bit odd at first, but it is a simple way to help most people realize how many filler words they are using when they speak. In less formal situations, this method can highlight how you are using these phrases. This way, you can adjust your behavior in other situations where you need to drop these words (such as more formal conversations).
“We have long adapted to our language preferences and therefore tend to ignore these filler words. ” says Steven Cohen, an assistant professor of communication at the University of Baltimore.
Another attention-grabbing way to help you analyze the timing and frequency of your use of filler words is to record yourself speaking on your smartphone’s camera. You can identify these phrases on the video and see how your facial expressions change when you say them. John Bates, a Los Angeles-based leadership communications coach who has worked with corporate clients such as NASA and Accenture, says you may look confused or appear less confident than you might otherwise when using filler words.
Powerful pauses
Most people use filler words so that the language can keep up with their thinking. So try inserting a one- or two-second “power pause” into your speech to achieve the same goal.
Instead of using filler words when you think, you should pause for a second or two to think, because it works better that way. “You should train yourself to tolerate long pauses and tell yourself that you won’t lose people’s attention and respect because of it. ” Statman said. She added that a short pause of a second or two is instead helpful for listeners, as most listeners do not receive information as fast as the speaker can speak.
Even in the process of learning to pause, Bates said, being able to “fully immerse” yourself in the conversation by avoiding distractions can enhance the organization of a speech because You’ll be more attentive to choosing the right words. Therefore, try to avoid distractions by not checking your smartphone or browsing the Internet, so that you can focus on your language.
Nervousness
Managing anxiety is equally helpful. You should acknowledge that you do feel nervous before a meeting or conversation, thus avoiding the use of filler words because of elevated nervousness levels. Focus on how you can use words to help your audience understand your thoughts, rather than spending too much energy thinking about what others think of you.
“Note that you may be a little nervous and uncomfortable, so you should shift your focus from yourself to the audience. ” Bates said.
Learn to diagnose your “filler word high areas” to better anticipate the adjustments you’ll need to make, Cohen said. He explained that people often use filler words at the beginning and end of sentences, or when moving from one thought to another. Paying more attention to your presentation in weak areas can better circumvent filler word traps.
Introductions, summaries and other complex parts of a speech are particularly prone to filler words. Instead of trying to memorize the entire speech, devote more effort to these sections. Cohen explains that increasing confidence in your ability to use words can help reduce the use of filler words. “The more you practice, the more relaxed you will be when expounding on the content. ” he says.
Use in moderation
But you can also use filler words occasionally. Sometimes using words like “for example” can help you connect with colleagues and make your presentation seem more natural and less formal.
Don’t ditch filler words altogether; Statman recommends dropping about 90 percent of them, but keeping the rest, especially in casual conversations with colleagues. “You want to give a stronger sense of authenticity, and that requires the use of filler words. ” she says.
Lesley Stolz, director of Johnson JLABs, said it takes years to learn to pause and to appear more confident by removing extra words when speaking. Stolz had worked alongside Bates, and although it took 18 years to improve her presentation skills, she found that filling in words was a tricky problem.
Earlier in her career, she used to rehearse hard to get rid of filler words in her presentations, but didn’t realize how often those words would also come up in internal conversations or during deal negotiations. More recently, she has become more concerned about filler words that come up in informal settings.
“When I’m negotiating a deal, filler words can really present a big hurdle. “It’s always reinforced,” she says. “
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